


Plan B

by PeppermintClouds



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-05-09 08:37:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 40,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5532800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeppermintClouds/pseuds/PeppermintClouds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was the girl who had her entire life planned out before her. He was just a green-eyed stranger who happened to be in the wrong place at the right time. Together they made the mistake of a lifetime. [Modern college AU. Rated T for alcohol use and rough language. Slight trigger warning for miscarriage, depression.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Green Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> My first full-length story in all its glory. Unedited and full of mistakes that I just don't have time to go back and fix. Enjoy

Astrid didn't know why she had agreed to letting Ruff drag her to that place. Maybe it was because Rachel “Ruffnut” Thorston was her best friend, or maybe it was just because it had been too long since she had last given herself a chance to have some real fun. But now, sitting at the bar and drumming her fingers on its smooth surface as she waited for her drink, she wished she hadn't.

Eret placed her drink on the bar in front of her, a knowing grin on his face. “So, for my own safety, where did that blonde madwoman you call a friend disappear to? Home, I hope?”

Astrid took a sip of her drink. “No, she's around here somewhere. Probably hitting on the guy who drives that motorcycle out there.” She gestured to the tinted windows facing the parking lot.

Eret’s chuckled and shook his head. “I'm just glad that I don't have to hide in the backroom tonight.”

Astrid rolled her eyes. She brought her glass to her lips as she surveyed the room. If Ruffnut was going to get lucky tonight, then so was she.

She spotted Ruff at one of the tables, fawning over a tattooed guy that she didn't recognize. The guy had one of his muscled arms slung around her shoulders, and Ruffnut didn't seem to mind at all.

She let her eyes stray to the table in the corner of the bar, where Scott Jorgenson was sitting with his obnoxious football friends. Two giggling girls were sitting with them, hanging on his every word. Astrid looked away, uninterested.

At one time she had been one of those giggling, popularity-obsessed girls, her biggest problem deciding what color shoes to wear with her outfit. She had dated Scott for a few magical months in high school, and he had been everything she had expected him to be. Dumb, ignorant, and utterly perfect. Every teenage girl’s vision of Prince Charming. But then she had grown up and realized that she couldn't spend her whole life trying to fit a mold that she just… _didn't_.

Her eyes landed on a man sitting alone just a few feet away from her at the bar, a drink in his hand. His emerald eyes scanned the room, almost as if he was looking for someone, but no one stepped forward.

Astrid took another swig of her drink and set it down on the bar. She bit her lip as she looked the handsome stranger up and down. He was tall and thin, but his clothes clung to his form just enough to make her blush. His auburn hair was slightly long, and she wondered if it was as soft as it looked.

Mr. Mysterious pulled a phone from a pocket in his jacket and smiled. She wondered if it was his girlfriend that had texted him or his mother. She had certainly dealt with both when she was with Scott.

Astrid cleared her throat and looked back down at her drink. She wasn't going to get ahead of herself tonight. This was her night to just have fun.

But she couldn't help it when she glanced at him again from under her lashes. She sat up straighter when she noticed that his eyes were on her, a lopsided smile on his lips, and looked away quickly.

Astrid’s heart fluttered in her chest when someone sat down next to her.

“This seat isn't taken, is it?”

Astrid looked up and found herself staring into the most brilliant pair of green eyes that she had ever seen. They were the color of a lush forest, and sparkled with childlike curiosity that made her smile.

“It is now,” she said.

Mr. Mysterious chuckled and leaned against the bar. “You're very witty, you know.”

Astrid finished the last of her drink. She slammed the empty glass down on the bar and waved Eret over. “Another one of those,” she mumbled. Eret nodded and disappeared.

“Don't compliment me,” Astrid said.

“Why not?” He asked.

Astrid huffed. “Because complimenting me won't get you anywhere tonight.”

“What makes you think that I plan to get anywhere tonight?”

“Why do you keep asking me stupid questions?”

Mr. Mysterious laughed this time and ordered something when Eret returned with Astrid's drink. He stared at the rows of bottles glinting behind the bar.

“So what brings you here?” he asked.

“My friend forced me to come here with her. She's off with some guy,” Astrid sighed. “I know she's drunk by now, so I have to stay and drive her home. You?”

He gave her a lopsided grin. “It’s just been a long day.”

Astrid nodded and chewed her lower lip anxiously. She watched as Ruff danced with her tattooed friend from earlier to loud, thumping music that made her head hurt.

“That your friend?” he asked suddenly.

Astrid followed his gaze to Ruff and nodded. “Unfortunately,” she said. He chuckled and took a swig of his drink.

“You know, you have very pretty eyes,” he observed.

Astrid narrowed her eyes at him and set her own drink down. “I thought I told you to quit complimenting me. I'm not the easy plaything you're used to.”

His grin fell a bit. “That I'm used to? What makes you think that I have picked up women in bars?”

Astrid looked him up and down. She gave him a blank look.

“What?”

“Your whole outfit. It just screams: ‘Please Take Me Home.” It really fits you,” Astrid said.

“Wow, I think that's a bit long for my license. How about just ‘Me?’” he laughed.

Astrid rolled her eyes and sighed. As adorable as the guy was, his sarcasm was annoying. At least he wouldn't be cracking jokes when she got him back to her apartment, because that would be a deal breaker. She really had to check up on Ruff though.

“But I meant what I said. You really do have pretty eyes,” he said quietly after a long pause.

Astrid's eyes met his green ones. The corner of her lips lifted in a smirk. Then she was twisting her fingers in his dark hair and crashing her lips over his. He wrapped a thin arm around her waist.

She nipped at his lower lip and soothed it by swiping her tongue over it. He moaned and opened his mouth so that their tongues could meet. He tasted like cool spearmint and alcohol, which made her shiver. Maybe she could pick up some spearmint gum on her way home.

She grabbed his hand and placed it on her thigh. It ran down to her knee and back up to play with the hem of her dress on her upper thigh. Astrid moved to the edge of the bar stool she was sitting on to give him more access.

He pulled away, breathing heavily. He hesitated before asking, “You wanna get out of here?”

As much as she wanted to scream yes and drag him out to her car, Astrid looked over her shoulder and scanned the bar for Ruffnut and her tattooed partner. No matter where she looked, she couldn't find either of them. “I can't.”

“I live right over on Riverfront, I can bring you back.”

Riverfront street? Her apartment building was on Riverfront, right next to the old ice cream shop with its checkered tile floors and red booths that she and Ruffnut sometimes visited during the summer.

“Near the old ice cream shop?” she blurted.

“Yeah, how did you know?”

Astrid shook her head and looked down at the bar. This was her chance to live, to have some real fun. “How do I know that you aren't going to kidnap me or something?”

He stood and offered her a hand. “I guess you'll just have to see. But I promise that I won't disappoint.”

Ruffnut had her cellphone. She could call Heather or get a cab if she needed a ride. Astrid knew that the guy that had been with her would be stupid if he tried to do anything she didn't want, so she was not worried. Ruff had taken karate with her brother as a kid, and would no doubt put him in the hospital, drunk or not.

Astrid took his hand and let him lead her outside to his car. She felt a wave of courage rush through her veins as she climbed into the passenger seat and buckled her seatbelt. He grinned at her, his green eyes glowing in the darkness.

They turned on several streets before finally coming to a stop in front of one of the many apartment buildings on Riverfront. Astrid bit her lip as he led her inside and up the stairs to his apartment. He pinned her against the door as soon it was closed, his breath warm on her neck.

Their eyes met for only a second before his lips were on hers and his hand was slipping under her dress. Astrid, her mind clouded by alcohol and lust, let him pull her toward the bed.

* * *

Astrid woke up with a pounding headache. She groaned and reached for her phone, which she always kept on her nightstand at night. She lifted it and squinted down at the bright screen, confused. A black cat with piercing green eyes met her eyes, part of its scruffy tail missing. A notification popped up suddenly.

_One unread text message from Frankie._

Astrid let her curiosity get the best of her and swiped her finger over it, unlocking the phone. She read the text silently.

_Hey are you going to be at D &D this weekend? Scott and Tuff will be gone so it's just us. _

She bit her lip and glanced at the man behind her. His lips were parted slightly, his hair falling over his closed eyes. She looked back down at the phone. She tapped the text box and typed in a message. She pressed the send button with a small smile.

_What about our girlfriends?_

The phone chimed as a new text popped up from Frankie: _LOL. What girlfriends?_

So did that mean Mr. Mysterious was up for takes? Because she certainly wouldn't mind having him around after a long week of exams and late shifts at the café.

She chuckled to herself. He stirred a bit next to her, but didn't wake up as she sent a quick reply to Frankie.

_With a girl right now ;)_

The bedroom was silent other than the buzz of the morning traffic below and the low purring of the cat. She drummed her fingers against the sides of the phone while she waited.

_No way Henry! Who? You have to tell me who fell for your science puns this time!_

Henry? Science puns? What the hell had she gotten herself into?

 _Mysterious blonde_ , she replied.

_Ooh mysterious! You should ask her out, you've been mourning you know who for too long and it worries me._

_Maybe_. Astrid texted him back before turning the phone off and returning it to the nightstand. Mr. Mysterious' grip on her waist tightened when it vibrated and chimed with a new text. He mumbled something into his pillow.

Astrid stared up at the unpainted ceiling and wondered what kind of mess she had gotten herself into. She had gotten drunk and slept with a total stranger- _Henry_ -who turned out to be an all out geek. A hot geek, she would admit, but she didn't do geeks. And now she knew that he might have used her to get over his ex. Not that it should have mattered to her, because she had used him too.

She sighed when he rolled onto his other side and tugged the blankets tighter around himself. Astrid threw her legs over the side of the bed and wasted no time in finding her dress and pulling it over her head. She cursed under her breath when the zipper caught on a loose thread, and decided to just leave it. She was frantically stuffing her underwear into her purse when she heard him move.

“Fish?” he called, his voice still hoarse from sleep

 _Damn it, damn it, damn it_. Astrid held her breath and stared at him with wide eyes, her heels dangling precariously from one hand and her purse clutched in the other. From its spot on Henry’s chest, the cat seemed to be smirking at her.

She never did like cats.

Astrid watched his chest rise and fall for a few minutes before opening the door and running down the hall on the balls of her feet. She passed through another room, which she guessed was some sort of living room based on the TV and couch in the center. She stepped carefully over a towering stack of Xbox games, her purse just barely touching the one on top. For a moment, she could have sworn that her heart stopped.

The stack teetered for a moment but did not fall, much to Astrid's relief. She nearly smiled at the sight of the door. She pushed it open and shut it firmly behind her, not caring if Henry woke up or not.

She looked at her reflection in the brass plate on his door that read 11B. Her hair was a mess and her eyeliner had smudged under her eyes. She frowned and turned away, taking in the familiar hallway.

Astrid found it odd that he happened to live not only in the same building as her, but on the same floor. Her own apartment was only two doors down from his. She unlocked it and dropped her keys on the counter, along with her purse.

She looked down the hall and was somewhat relieved to see that Ruffnut's bedroom door was still closed. She was probably hungover, so Astrid figured that she would not see much of her. She placed a bucket outside her door just in case. Best friends or not, she was not going to clean up someone else's puke after the night she had had.

Heather was nowhere to be seen, as usual. Her door was open, everything inside neat and pristine, and Astrid could see that her leather jacket wasn't hanging up next to the door.

Astrid ran a hand through her disheveled hair as she closed the bathroom door behind her. She narrowed her eyes at her reflection in the mirror over the sink and turned away to turn the shower on, not wanting to see any reminders of the night before on her skin. She unzipped her dress and stepped out of it, sighing. She dropped it in the laundry hamper. It felt nice to not have the fabric hugging her waist so tightly that she was forced to take shallow breaths to avoid splitting the seams. She stepped under the warm spray of the shower.

She squeezed a small amount of her vanilla shampoo into her hand and began to work into her hair. She raked her fingers over her scalp, her eyes falling shut. The water pounding against her back was oddly soothing.

Blurry bits of the night before slowly came back to her as she stepped out of the spray to run a loofah over her flushed skin.

Astrid leaned against the wall of the shower and groaned. Even with him asleep and two doors away, he had taken control of her thoughts. She put the loofa back and began to wash away the suds scurrying down her arms.

Astrid growled and banged a fist against the wall of the shower. A bottle fell from the shower caddy and hit the floor with a loud crash, probably waking Ruff and her tattooed friend in the next room. Damn Henry and his stupid Dungeons & Dragons and all of his science puns. She couldn't close her eyes, couldn't think, without seeing him.

Astrid bent to pick up the bottle and returned it to the caddy. She turned off the shower and grabbed her fluffy blue robe, hanging from it's hook on the wall next to Ruffnut's purple one. She slipped it on and pushed her wet hair back from her face.

She crossed the hall to her bedroom and closed the door behind her. She changed into a pair of jeans and a simple t-shirt, then braided her blonde hair over her shoulder.

For no reason at all, she wondered if Henry had woken up yet and seen the texts she had sent to Frankie. She hoped he did, because she had no doubt that he was the type of guy that would keep a hook up a secret.

Astrid smirked as she left her room. She went into the kitchen and pulled a bowl from one of the cupboards. She set it on the counter, grabbed a spoon, and went into the pantry to find the Cinnamon Crunch she had just picked up. She filled her bowl and poured milk over the cereal, then sat down at the counter, pulling her laptop in front of her.

She lifted a spoonful of cereal to her mouth as the laptop turned on. She opened the web browser and froze, her fingers pausing over the keys. She typed in Facebook and clicked the first thing that popped up.

She swallowed another spoonful of cereal as she clicked on her profile. Her own face appeared on the screen, a picture from high school where her smile was too fake and her makeup too heavy. She made a mental note to change it later.

“Whatcha' doing?” Ruffnut asked as she sat down next to Astrid, startling the other girl.

Astrid dropped the spoon, splashing milk all over the counter. “Ruff! What is wrong with you?!”

The other blonde smirked. “Too many things, but that’s why you love me.”

Astrid stood and grabbed a towel to clean up the milk. She let herself release a breath that she didn't know she had been holding when she saw that her laptop was fine. She threw the towel in the washing machine and retook her spot in front of her laptop.

“So, who are you stalking now?”

Astrid rolled her eyes and opened her friend list, then clicked on Scott Jorgenson's picture. Why she was still friends with him she didn't know, but she had a feeling that there was a connection between him and Henry.

“I'm not stalking anyone. What happened to your friend from last night? Did you scare him off with all the kinky stuff under your bed?”

She browsed through Scott's friend list, and froze when she spotted the same pair of mysterious green eyes from the night before.

 _Henry Haddock_. Like the fish haddock. Astrid hated fish.

He was right there, everything there was to know about him at her fingertips, but all she could think about was fish and how impossibly soft his lips were. Wait, what?

She didn't even realize that Ruff was talking until the other woman flicked the side of her head. Astrid turned her glare on her.

“I didn't scare him off. He had a girlfriend. But why are you, of all people, so interested in a guy?” Ruff asked.

“I'm not interested in him, Ruff.” Astrid minimized the page and shut her laptop. She stood to take her bowl to the sink.

Ruffnut followed her. “I saw you leave with him last night.” Seeing Astrid's blush, her eyes widened. She clapped a hand over her mouth and cackled. “Oh God, you fucked him, didn't you? Perfect little Astrid Hofferson finally got laid!”

Astrid smacked her arm. “Shut up. It was just sex, nothing more.”

“Yeah, you say that now. Wait until you have six kids and drive a minivan.”

“Rachel!”

Ruff winced and clutched her chest dramatically. “Ouch, not the ‘R' word.”

Astrid huffed and grabbed her laptop. She went into her bedroom, then collapsed on her bed. She was just about to open it and check out his profile when Ruffnut appeared in the doorway.

“Hey, you're coming with me to my brother's stupid party next Sunday, right? I don't what kind of moron he is for having a party on a Sunday though. Ugh,” she said.

Astrid sighed and pushed the laptop away. “Ruff, we have class the next day-“

“Oh come on, lighten up! We went out last night and you had fun!” Ruff pointed out.

“Yesterday was a Friday,” Astrid mumbled.

Ruff wasn't listening anyways. “’Cause I don't wanna be alone with him and his dumb friends all night. They'd probably try to get me to do weed again or something.”

Astrid looked down at her chipped fingernail polish, thinking. Could she really afford to be late for class on Monday with the exam next week? That test was everything. If she screwed up and missed something important, she might as well dedicate her life to playing Dungeons & Dragons with Henry and his nerd friends. Ugh.

But Ruff was right. They really didn't do much anymore except sit around and make fun of ridiculous dramas on TV. Last night had been the first time that she had gotten into bed with someone in almost a year. And a year was a long time for Astrid Hofferson.

Astrid looked up but didn't meet Ruffnut's wide eyes. She found herself staring at an old poster of a band that she had liked in high school, for some reason taped up on her wall even though she didn't remember any of their songs.

“Fine. I will go to this stupid party with your brother and his idiot friends for one hour. One hour, Ruff. And I'm leaving as soon as he starts offering to show people the tattoo on his ass,” Astrid hissed.

Ruffnut laughed and crossed her arms. “He only did that once. I still remember when he got that-”

“Please do not finish that sentence. I really don't want to hear about how your brother got his own name tattooed on his ass.”

“Whatever. We're going to have fun tomorrow night, so be ready,” Ruff called as she disappeared down the hall.

Astrid sighed and opened her laptop. Facebook popped up, and then she was staring into those beautiful forest green eyes again. “I really wish I was, Ruff.”


	2. Nicknames and Knockouts

Astrid wasn't sure of what to think as they waited outside Tuff's door. 11B, just her luck. She could hear loud music and laughter inside, but was not at all feeling the vibe Ruff seemed to be. The other girl was grinning, her long hair pulled into a ponytail instead of loose as she usually left it.

Astrid pounded a fist on the door, her patience trickling down the invisible drain at her feet with every pulse of the bass inside. She was just about to give up and ditch Ruffnut when the door flew open. Scott Jorgenson, absolute high school heartbreaker, leered at them and stepped to the side so they could come in, his eyes never leaving Astrid's chest.

She tugged the neckline of her top up self-consciously. His gaze didn't shift, even when she left him at the door to follow Ruff into the kitchen.

Bad decision. A girl was laying on the table when they came in, holding her top up so someone could pour vodka into her naval. Another girl, almost too drunk to stand, sucked the alcohol up and pumped a fist into the air. People cheered and someone else took the girl on the table's place.

Astrid rolled her eyes and stepped out of the kitchen. As soon as she had broken away from the crowd, Scott appeared in front of her, that leering grin still on his lips.

“Hey,” he said.

Astrid narrowed her eyes at him. Not that he noticed, he was obviously talking to her boobs and not her face. She felt the urge to adjust her top again. “Get out of my way.”

“I've really missed you,” Scott continued.

“I don't care. Move.”

“You must be Google, because I've found just what I'm searching for.”

Astrid rolled her eyes. Where did he get that one, the internet?

Scott rested a hand on the wall behind her, cornering her. Astrid's hands balled into fists at her sides. She gripped the sides of her denim shorts to keep herself from breaking his nose. Not that he didn't deserve it, because he really did.

“You know, I have never felt the same way about another girl, Astrid. You are so pretty, and smart, and… uh, nice. You've got a great figure too. Do you work out?”

She couldn't hold back anymore. She growled and saw her own fist crash into the side of his nose, which cracked loudly. Blood spouted from his nose and stained the neck of his Blues jersey. She held her hand to her chest as she watched, feeling oddly content.

“You bitch!” Scott roared, but it actually came out sounding like  _ ‘Oo biff.’ _

A few people turned to look at them. A few gaped at the scene and whispered, while others just rolled their eyes and ignored them. It wasn't the first time that Scott had been punched by one of his many exes. Astrid was just the most recent to gain enough courage to do so.

Astrid looked around the room with livid eyes. Great. It was only her second semester in college and she had already made a few enemies, judging by the glares a group of freshman girls were giving her. She couldn't care less about what they thought of her, but she didn't need them looking at her like she was invading their turf.

She brushed passed Scott and ignored his protest. One of his bloody hands grabbed her arm but she shook it off. She had to Ruff and get out before anything else could happen.

There were four doors, two on either side of the small hallways she had gone down. She pressed her ear against the first door and heard nothing. A familiar smell escaped under the second, so she pushed it open.

Ruffnut was sitting in a circle with her dreadlock-wearing brother and some of his friends, her eyes glazed over. A grin stretched across her face when she saw Astrid.

“'Strid!” she cheered. “You're just in time. We were just about to break out the good stuff.”

Astrid wrinkled her nose. “No. We need to go home.”

Ruff frowned and leaned against her brother, who had long-since passed out. “Why? I'm having so much fun, ‘Strid. You should try having fun. I think you'd like it.”

“Because I just broke Scott Jorgenson’s nose, now come on! Get up!” Astrid grabbed the other girl’s arms and hauled her to her feet. Ruff giggled and fell back down.

“No. I like it here.”

“Rachel-“

“Noooo-“

Astrid let go of her limp arms and stepped away from the circle. “Fine. Stay. But don't expect anyone to let you in at three am,” Astrid huffed.

Ruff grinned. “Ok, mom.”

Astrid shook her head as she closed the door behind her, sealing the smell inside the room. She ran a hand over her face as she walked back down the hall and pushed her way through the growing crowd. Just great. She turned a corner and collided with something warm and solid.

She pushed her against the person's- _ his _ -chest and looked up into brilliant forest green eyes.

_ Shit _ . That was the first thing to register in her mind. Then she was stepping back, crossing her arms and looking away.

Henry rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Uh, hey.”

Astrid crossed her arms. “Hi.”

“So… what are you doing here?”

Where had all of that confidence gone? Astrid looked down at her shoes, her mind suddenly filled with bits and pieces of that night in his room.

“I'm here with a friend. We live across the hall,” she said.

“What about you?”

“I, uh, live here.”

“Oh really? Good, because it's kind of weird to bring a girl back to your friend's room,” Astrid said sarcastically. She saw the corners of his lips curl downwards.

“Yeah. Not exactly the most romantic night of my life…”

“Are you saying that it was bad?”

“No! I just… I don't remember much. But it was good-really good-from what I do remember,” he said.

“It's so loud in here. I can barely hear you,” she said.

“Oh. Do you, uh, wanna-“

“I’m not having sex with you if that's what you're going to ask.”

He blinked dumbly at her, his face flushed a light pink. “No, I was going to ask if you wanted to go somewhere quiet.”

“Oh,” Astrid said quietly. “Yeah, that sounds nice.”

A lopsided grin stretched across his face. Somehow it made him looked even more handsome as he led her back down the hallway. He opened one of the doors and held it open for her, like she had always seen in those old movies, and she chuckled.

She sat down on the bed, trying to ignore the fact that the last time she had been in the same bed they had both been naked and sweaty, too drunk to care about the repercussions that would follow the next morning.

“So, I saw that you met Frankie.”

Astrid's small smile fell. “Sorry about that. I was just checking the time, and then I saw the text-“

He shook his head and sat down in front of the bed. “No, it's not really a big deal. I'm just not a huge fan of your knowing my real name.”

“Henry?” she asked. He winced and nodded. “What's wrong with Henry?”

“I prefer Hiccup. I'm not really a Henry sort of guy, and it just kind of caught on, so… yeah. My name is Hiccup now.”

“Astrid. But how did you get the nickname Hiccup? Scott used to go by Snot, so is this just the apartment where everyone is nicknamed after an involuntary reflex?” Astrid laughed.

He leaned back on his hands, smiling. “It's a long story.”

“I've got time,” she said.

Hiccup's smile faltered. There was a strange look in his eyes that she couldn't quite place. He cleared his throat awkwardly and began to pick at a loose thread on his shirt.

“Well, it's kind of embarrassing anyway,” he said. He rubbed the back of his neck again- Astrid figured that it was a nervous habit of his.

“I’ve seen you naked, there's no reason to be embarrassed.” Astrid grinned when he blushed and looked away.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I didn't-I had no idea that you lived across the hall from me. If I would have known, I probably wouldn't have-“

Astrid laughed and pulled her legs under her. “No, no, I had fun. But I hope that the next time we meet it won't be for drunk sex or because we didn't have a choice.”

“If we meet again? Are you implying that you want to see me again?” Hiccup asked, his tone light and playful. That lopsided smile was playing with his lips.

“Maybe I am.”

There it was again. The strange look in his green eyes. It was something like curiosity and regret and happiness all rolled into one. Then it was gone as quick as it had appeared.

Astrid stood up from the bed and pulled out her phone. It was already after midnight, and she really needed to get home if she was going to be on-time for class the next day. Hiccup stood also.

“So, um, do you maybe want to get coffee sometime?” Astrid asked.

Hiccup looked surprised for a moment. Then he seemed to come back to reality and smiled. “Yeah. I would like that. Here, let me give you my number.”

Astrid handed her phone over and waited for him to type in his number. He handed it back after a few seconds and stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “Just text me so I have yours.”

She typed in a quick message and clicked the send button. His phone went off on a desk she hadn't noticed before on the other side of the room, and he grabbed it.

“So, how about Tuesday?” Hiccup asked.

“Next Tuesday?” 

He nodded. 

“I can't. I have to take my car in to get my tires rotated. And then I’m visiting my brother in Colorado… what about the Saturday after that week?” Astrid asked.

“Sure. I guess I'll see you then.”

Astrid smiled at him. “Great. I should be going, but text me sometime.”

“I will.”

Astrid felt his eyes on her back as she pushed her way through the crowd. Her heart fluttered against her ribcage, but for some reason, she couldn't find it in herself to be mad at him. She glared at Snot as she passed him and left the apartment.

She glanced back at the shiny brass plate on the door before turning and crossing the hall to her own.

* * *

“So you're going out with a guy you picked up at a bar? Isn't there some kind of dating rule against that?” Ruff asked.

“There aren't any rules for dating, Ruff,” Astrid replied from where she sat on the couch, her laptop open to a fresh page and sitting in her lap.

“Yeah there is. Like, you shouldn't let a guy put anything in your drink if you don't know him. Everyone knows that.”

“That's called common sense,” Astrid deadpanned.

“Whatever. Speaking of hot guys in bars, any chance you could talk to Eret for me?” Ruff asked, rolling onto her stomach on the floor to look up at her.

“What, why?”

“Because he is gorgeous and he's in your Mythology class. He's my future husband, Astrid, do this one little favor for me. I swear that I'll be there when you and your nerd hookup get hitched,” Ruff pleaded.

“Hiccup and I are not getting married-we're not even really friends,” Astrid said.

“Friends don't get drunk and do each other.”

“You tried to kiss me once when you were drunk,” Astrid pointed out.

Ruff groaned into the carpet. “It was one time. But come on, talk to him for me. I'll let you be my maid of honor if you do this for me.”

Astrid sighed and shut her laptop. “Fine. But what's in it for me?”

“I'll buy you and Hiccup a box of glow in the dark condoms. You can get freaky all night long.”

Astrid threw the pillow her laptop had been resting on at her. “I already told you that  _ we're just getting coffee _ .”

Ruffnut rolled her eyes and raised an arm to deflect the pillow. “Yeah, yeah, I'll believe it when I see it.” She sat up and padded into the kitchen, mumbling under her breath. Astrid narrowed her eyes and leaned forward to grab the pillow, which she hurled at Ruff as hard as she could. 

“Ow!”

Astrid grinned to herself as she turned around and opened her computer. That was, until the pillow came flying back and hit the back of her head, making her drop her laptop out of surprise.

Astrid jumped up from the couch and chased after the taller blonde. Ruffnut, having longer legs and being on the lacrosse team, reached her bedroom just seconds before Astrid did and slammed the door shut. Astrid banged her fists against it until the other girl's laughter subsided and her hands hurt.

* * *

Astrid lowered herself into a crouch as the ball descended above her. Her arms were sore but she forced herself to keep them straight as she lunged for the ball. Her scream bounced off of the walls of the gym as she sent the ball sailing back over the net.

A shorter blonde-haired girl on the other team-the Bog Burglars, a longtime rival to the Berk Dragons- jumped up and spiked it back. It slammed to the floor just in front of Astrid's feet.

Astrid grit her teeth and looked back at her team behind her. She nodded and a few nodded back or smiled. She turned around and glared at the blonde girl who had scored. The girl smirked and flipped her hair as she high-fived one of the other Bog players.

The whistle blew, signaling a five minute break.

“Hofferson!” her coach called, his blond brow knit over blue eyes.

Astrid jogged over to Gobber. He tossed her a water bottle and she caught it. She closed her eyes in relief as she took a long drink from it.

“What was that out there?” the burly man asked. He looked almost comical holding his tiny clipboard with the silver whistle around his neck.

“I didn't have enough time to get in there. She spiked it.”

“Yes, I saw that. But you can't let them get to you- especially not Cara. She'll use that to her advantage and step all over you,” Gobber said, laying a hand on her shoulder.

“Which one's Cara?” Astrid panted.

“Short blonde. Team captain. She's known as Camicazi for a reason you know. She's dangerous for our team.” Gobber took the water bottle back and pointed out the smirking blonde with unruly curly hair. Astrid wondered if she had ever even tried to brush it. “Take her out and this should be a good game.”

Astrid nodded. “Got it. Take out the ringleader.”

Gobber smiled at her and clapped a hand over her back. “That's the Astrid I know. Now get out there!”

She trotted back to her spot and got into position. She watched as the girl behind her, Heather, sent the ball flying over their heads in a powerful overhand serve.

Camicazi grinned and said something to the redhead next to her. The girl nodded and stepped back into her place. She blended back into the sea of purple and red uniforms, the dark smile on her lips unseen.

The ball soared over the net, falling right toward Camicazi. She jumped up, only for the redhead to step in front of her and bump the ball over the net. Camicazi fumed, her blue eyes burning into the other girl. She shoved her back.

“Remember your place, Lindsey!” She growled.

The redhead, Lindsey, quirked an eyebrow at her. She took a step forward so that she towered over Camicazi by nearly half a head. “Don't tell me what to do, shorty. We all know that I would make a better captain than you.”

Someone must have caught the ball, because Astrid never heard it hit the ground. She didn't look around to see who had though. It was far too interesting to watch The Great Camicazi blow up at one of her teammates for getting in her way of victory.

“Oh really? I'd like to see you try.” Camicazi's fist connect with the other girl's abdomen, which made her groan in pain. Lindsey grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled. Camicazi yelled and twisted out of her grip, then elbowed her in the face. She used her lower gravity to throw Lindsey to the floor.

The rest of the Burglars stood back as they watched their captain fight with the bigger girl. Camicazi was clearly winning, but Lindsey wasn't going to give up anytime soon.

Gobber's whistle startled the whispering girls. He held his clipboard at his side as he rushed over. “Girls! Stop actin' like a couple of muttonheads!”

Camicazi sneered at Lindsey as Gobber pulled her off of the other girl by her arms. She shrugged his hands off and marched out of the gym, her blonde hair flouncing. A few girls cringed when the blue double doors slammed shut behind her.

Gobber looked around at the others. “Go home, all of you. Hopefully we can pick up next week without any interruptions.” He narrowed his eyes at Lindsey, who rolled her eyes and followed the rest of her team.

Astrid smiled at her teammates as she jogged past them to catch up with Heather. The dark-haired girl's jade eyes lit up when she saw her.

“Hey, haven't seen you in a while,” Heather said.

Astrid stopped to pick up her bag from the first row of the bleachers. She took a sip of her water bottle and put it back in the bag before slinging it over her shoulder. “You're never home.”

“I'm a busy woman.” Heather pushed open one of the doors and looked back at Astrid, her black ponytail swinging. “You know what that's like what with your job at the diner and school.”

“Yeah. It's just been a long time since we last had a chance to talk like this. I kind of missed it.” Astrid followed Heather across the parking lot to her car and slid into the passenger side. She tossed her bag in the back and reached for her seatbelt just as Heather was getting in the car.

“I did too. How about we get lunch before we head back? On me.”

“Great.” Astrid smiled at Heather as the other girl pulled out of the parking lot and turned onto the road. Buildings and cars shot by, and Astrid once again found herself marveling city's beauty.


	3. Raindrops Keep on Falling

Astrid sighed as she stepped out of the car and looked up at the building rising before her. She waved at Ruff as she drove off. She checked her phone one last time before pushing the door open and scanning the coffee shop for a familiar face.

It had been nearly a month since she had seen him at Scott's party, and she missed that lopsided grin and those bright green eyes. She smiled when she saw a hand raise from one of the corner tables. She walked over and took a seat across from him.

“Hey,” Hiccup said.

“Hey yourself.”

“Still witty, I see.” There was that grin she had missed so much for the past few weeks.

“Of course. Now are we going to order or not?” Astrid laughed.

Hiccup grinned and followed her to the counter. The teenage girl behind the cash register gave them a small smile as they ordered their coffee.

“$5.97,” she said quietly, refusing to meet their eyes.

Hiccup reached into his pocket and handed her a ten dollar bill. Astrid glared at him as she slapped a five down on the counter.

“I can pay for my own coffee,” she hissed.

The girl looked between the two of them and then down at the single receipt. “Um, so… do you want me to print another receipt?”

“No. I’m paying separately for the mocha,” Astrid told her.

“No she isn't. Just one receipt is fine.” Hiccup nodded at the girl and she handed him the receipt and change before scurrying off.

“I can't believe you did that, you ass.” Astrid drummed her fingers on the counter as they waited, her lips pursed.

“Believe it. Oh, here's our coffee,” he said. He took the steaming foam cups from the girl and handed one to Astrid. They walked back to their table in silence and took their respective seats.

“So, tell me about yourself,” Hiccup said. He took a sip from his cup, his emerald eyes watching her over the edge.

“Well, I have a greyhound. Her name is Stormfly.”  Astrid looked down at her cup didn't drink from it. There was something about the smell that made her feel nauseous and she feared that the girl might have messed up and put something wrong in her coffee.

“Oh no, a dog person. I have a cat, Toothless, and I don't think he would be too happy if he knew about this,” Hiccup chuckled.

“Toothless?”

Hiccup set his cup down and crossed his arms. “One of his front teeth is chipped. I was fifteen when I found him and that was the first thing that I thought of. Except my dad didn't think it was as adorable as I did.”

“Why not?” Astrid asked.

“I found him as a kitten under someone's car during a storm. I hid him in my room for weeks before my dad found him under my bed when he was looking for one of my screwdrivers. He was mad but, even though he won't admit it, I know he has really warmed up to Toothless,” Hiccup explained

Astrid nodded. “I wish I could see Stormfly more often. She's with my parents in Minnesota, so it's really nice to see her when I can. We got her when I was nine and she has always been there for me when no one else could be.”

“That's what I love about animals.” Hiccup smiled at her.

Astrid lifted her cup to her lips. The taste that filled her mouth was horrible. She felt her stomach lurch and the cup slipped from her hand and fell to the floor, sending hot coffee flying everywhere. She jumped up and stumbled to the bathroom.

She didn’t even care that there was an older woman standing at the sinks when she threw the door open. The woman looked her up and down as Astrid ran into a stall. She heard the woman leave as she fell to her knees in front of the toilet and threw up what little breakfast she had eaten before rushing Ruff out of the house to meet Hiccup.

She flushed it and sat back against the stall door and drew her knees to her chest, trembling. The horrible taste lingered in her mouth and her stomach continued to roll. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

The door creaked open. “Astrid?”

Had he really come into the women's bathroom to find her? God, he was too perfect. Astrid really didn't know how she had gotten so lucky. She buried her face in her hands. Tears welled up in her eyes and she felt her makeup smudge under her fingers. “Go away, Hiccup.”

She saw him stop outside of the stall through the gap between the green door and the tile. “Astrid, what's wrong?”

So many things were wrong, and just when she had thought that they wouldn't be, that she had found the right guy. He probably thought she was sick or something- but the truth was that she had no idea.

She had gotten sick twice when she had gone back to Minnesota. Her mom had been worried, and suggested that she take a test. Looking back, Astrid wished that she had. Not that she was pregnant, because she couldn't be. She still had school, and work, and her whole life ahead of her. She couldn't be pregnant.

But it explained everything. The sickness, her sore breasts, the breakdowns.

Ruffnut was worried too. She had panicked when Astrid had broken down and started bawling when she saw that they didn't have any chocolate ice cream, because chocolate ice cream always made her feel better, and they didn't have any. But then Astrid had remembered that she had eaten an entire carton of ice cream the previous week, and that made her worry about her weight. She couldn't gain a ton of weight if she wanted to be the volleyball captain. That had made her scream even louder, and people from down the hall had knocked on their door.

She wasn't pregnant. Not possible. It was only one time.

“Astrid, what's wrong? Let me in.”

“I-I want to be alone,” she said, her voice cracking.

“Are you sure?”

“Please just give me a minute, Hiccup. I'm fine.”

There was a pause. “Alright. I'll wait for you outside then.”

Astrid opened her mouth to say something but closed it. She listened as the bathroom door closed behind him, leaving her alone. A sob left her lips.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. She dialed the first number that came to mind. She sniffed and wrapped her free arm around her knees as the phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Ruff, I-I need you to come get me,” she said softly like she wasn't ready to believe what was really happening. And she wasn't.

“Why? Did he hurt you? Because I swear, I'll beat his scrawny ass if he did-“

“No. It's not Hiccup. I think. I don't know. I just need you to come get me right now,” she said.

“Astrid, what is going on?”

“I really don't know, Ruff.”

She heard Ruffnut's car start and sighed. “I’ll be there in a few minutes. But I'm expecting an explanation when I get there,” Ruff said.

“I'll try.”

Ruff hung up and the line went dead. Astrid turned off her phone, then turned it back on. She looked at the bright clock and the date under it: July 24th, 2015. Scott's party had been on June 26th. That was four weeks ago, meaning her period was a week late. Shit.

But maybe this was just her period. She did have a habit of stress-eating around that time of the month, and it did explain the soreness and breakdowns.

Her phone chimed with a text from Ruff, and her train of thought went off the rails.

She stood slowly and left the bathroom, keeping her eyes downcast to avoid seeing her reflection out of the corner of her eye. She passed Hiccup as she walked to the door, and bit her lip when she saw that he was mopping up the spilled coffee with a rag. His eyes lit up when he saw her.

“Astrid!”

No, no, no, this was not how her plan had gone in her head. She walked faster and kept her head down. The door was only a few feet away now, she could make a run for it if necessary.

“Astrid, hey! Where are you going?” Hiccup called.

She pushed the door open, the little bell above it ringing, and ran outside. She climbed into Ruff's car. They left the parking lot, and Astrid's heart sank when she glanced over at the mirror and saw Hiccup standing outside, watching them go with a confused look on his face.

* * *

Astrid had practically dragged Ruffnut with her through the store. She wasn't going to do this alone, even if it meant bringing Ruff of all people with her.

They stopped in the middle of one of the colorful aisles, and Astrid swallowed the lump forming in her throat. This was it. She was going to find out the answer to all of her problems and it all depended on the contents of that little box.

“Give me your sunglasses,” Astrid said.

“What? No.” Ruff crossed her arms and leaned against the shelves.

“Give me your fucking sunglasses, Ruff!” Astrid glared at her and snatched them when the other girl tossed them at her. She slid them on and took a deep breath to calm herself. It didn’t work. She started to search the rows of boxes.

“Are you worried that someone is going to recognize you? Because if you're-“

“Don't say it,” Astrid growled as she picked up a pink box labeled _First Response_.

Ruff rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Anyway, people are going to know when you get all fat and emotional. And guess who else is going to find out? Your nerd hookup.”

“You know, maybe instead of criticizing me you should help me. I don't see anything stopping you.” Astrid grabbed another box. This one promised 99.6% accurate results. That was good enough for her. She threw it in the blue basket on her arm.

Ruff grumbled something as she stepped forward and scanned the shelves. She picked out a box and threw it at Astrid. “Here, that one has five pee sticks in it. Says that results are guaranteed as early as five days after your missed period. When was that?”

Astrid dropped it in the basket and ignored her question.

“Do you really need four boxes? Isn't one enough?” Ruffnut asked as she stood up.

“No, because one might not work. This is serious, Ruff.” Astrid turned to look at her but saw that she was gone. Great. Her crazy friend was wandering around Wal-Mart.

She started to weave her way through the aisles to the checkout. Something blue sitting one of the end shelves caught her eye. She stopped and picked up the card, shifting the basket on her arm so that she hold it up.

_Congrats._

_Hitting the bottle is about to take on a whole new meaning._

 

Astrid chuckled as she finished reading the card. It was something Hiccup would say, so for some insane reason she dropped it in the basket and continued toward the checkout lines. He had to find out and she would rather that he be smiling and confused instead of taking the nearest exit on the highway.

She groaned when she saw the cashier at the only open register. Tuffnut, her crazy friend's equally crazy brother and also Hiccup's roommate. Ruff was already there, something held under her arm as she talked to her brother.

“Nice of you to finally join us, Hofferson,” he said.

Astrid glared at her as she put her things on the conveyor belt. Tuff swiped them over the register and began to throw them over his head into a plastic bag like a basketball. It was a wonder that he had been hired in the first place.

Ruff threw something in front of him just as Astrid was unzipping her red wallet and pulling out at twenty dollar bill. Tuff grinned as he threw the box of condoms in the bag.

“I don't think condoms are gonna do you any good now, Hofferson. Even the glow in the dark ones.”

Astrid's glare left him and landed on his sister. Ruff cackled as she picked up the plastic bag. “I told you that I would buy them.”

Astrid slapped the twenty down and grabbed the bag from her. Rain soaked through her clothing as she ran through the parking lot, Ruff at her heels. They jumped into the car as lightning flashed overhead.

Ruff grinned at her, her long hair clinging to the sides of her face. “So what's next? Onesies?”

Astrid held the bag in her lap, the edges of the boxes digging into her thighs through her leggings. She watched as raindrops hit the windshield and were whisked away by the windshield wipers. Her stomach was cold with anxiety and fear that she too would be whisked away if her suspicions were correct.

“Cribs?”

Astrid remained silent as Ruff looked over her shoulder and pulled out of the parking space. They turned onto the road, the start of the afternoon traffic just beginning to go underway. The silence was uncomfortable, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. She was still shocked by the fact that she, Astrid Hofferson, prom queen and star volleyball captain, could be pregnant with the baby of a guy she barely knew. That went against every rule she had made for herself, every plan she that had remained unwritten.

“Astrid. I know you can hear me,” Ruff said.

Astrid turned in her seat to look at the other girl. “You want to talk about it Ruff? Fine, then let's talk about it. I had sex with a stranger, and now I might be pregnant even though I can't be, it's impossible because it was only one time, and I'm scared and I have no one and I don't know what to do-“

She ran a hand over her face and felt hot tears run down her cheeks, which made her sob harder.

Ruff rubbed her shoulder and offered her a small smile. “Hey, you have me and Heather. You have your parents. And you have Hiccup. He has been my brother's friend since fourth grade, I know him well enough by now that I'm sure when I say that he will be there for you. He's not that kind of guy, Astrid.”

Astrid sniffled. “Thanks Ruff. Can we just go home? I need to take these and I would rather do it there,” she asked.

“Yeah, of course. As long as I get to be the godmother.”

* * *

Astrid set the timer on her phone for three minutes and placed it next to the pregnancy tests laying out next to the sink. She watched the seconds tick away anxiously. Each of those seconds made her heart beat faster, her breath harder and harder to pull into her lungs.

Part of her just knew that the tests would be negative, while the other remained on edge, unsure but ready to accept whatever result appeared in the little window in two minutes and thirty-seven seconds.

She leaned against the sink and closed her eyes. Why did three minutes have to go by so slowly?

Out of all the things she might have to do in the next few months, Astrid knew that the hardest part would be telling Hiccup. He had seemed so happy when they had met up for coffee -until she had spilled hot coffee all over him anyway- and she wasn't sure if she could take that away from him.

Not to mention the fact that she had no idea what the hell she was going to do if she did have a kid in eight months. She was still in college and rarely had time to fold her own laundry for God's sake! How was she supposed to be a mom? She couldn't just drop out of school, her parents had spent years saving up for her tuition. And even if she did drop out, she couldn't go home a failure. A _pregnant_ failure.

Astrid checked the timer again. One minute and six seconds.

She looked up at her reflection in the mirror over the sink. The young woman looking back at her was unrecognizable. There was a dark coffee stain on her dark blue t-shirt. Her mascara had mixed with tears and run down her face in twin rivers on either side of her face.

But then there was that chance, albeit small, that she wasn't pregnant and there was no reason to worry. No one would ever even know about her little scare. She could get her degree and land herself a real job, maybe go back to Minnesota and settle down with a guy that would pay more attention to her than the sports game he was watching.

Even in her head, it sounded almost too good to be true after the morning she had had. But she clung to that tiny piece of hope as she watched the last few seconds dwindle away.

Astrid's phone buzzed, signaling the end of the timer. She held her breath as she looked through the result window at the pink symbol there.


	4. Dungeons & Dragons

Hiccup watched as the car Astrid had climbed into drove off. He felt something cold settle in his stomach as he turned away and went back into the coffee shop to grab his phone, which he had left at their table when he had followed Astrid.

He stuffed his phone into his pocket and grabbed his foam cup, which he dropped into the trashcan next to the door. He turned the corner and started the short walk back to his apartment. His car was in the shop, so he figured that he had better get used to walking everywhere he went. His motorcycle wasn't in the best shape either, now that he thought about it. He would take a look at it the next time he was at his parents' (he kept it parked in their second garage; they  never needed the space since his dad traveled so he had transformed into some sort of workshop) house.

It had been drizzling lightly when he had walked into the coffee shop, but now cold rain poured down from the sky in torrents. He walked faster, unable to run because of his prosthetic. His clothes were dripping and hung off his form by the time he reached his apartment building.

Hiccup shook water from his hair as he jogged up the stairs and pushed it out of his face. His shoe squeaked with every step down the hall to his door. When he unlocked it and walked in, he was glad that his roommate and best friend since first grade, Frankie “Fishlegs” Ingerman, had turned the heat up. He bent down to take his shoe off and sighed.

Fishlegs looked up from the couch where he was reading one of his new comics. “Hi. What happened to your mysterious blonde friend? Did it turn out that she didn’t like science puns after all?”

Hiccup grabbed a towel from the bathroom and used it to dry his hair as he went into his bedroom. “No,” he called. “I don't know. She left with someone else.”

Fishlegs sat up and set his comic on the table. “What? Why would she do that?”

“I don't know, Fish. She just… something weird was going on with her,” Hiccup said as he pulled his coffee-stained wet t-shirt over his head and grabbed a dry shirt. He pushed his jeans down and threw them in the growing pile of clothes, then pulled a pair of old sweats.

“Maybe she didn't feel well,” Fishlegs said.

Hiccup picked up his wet clothes and dropped them in the laundry hamper. “Yeah, maybe. After she spilled coffee everywhere, she did run to the bathroom.”

“Did you go after her?” Fishlegs asked. His blond eyebrows knit together over his eyes.

“Yeah, but she was puking when I found her. She told me that she wanted to be alone and I left.”

“Was she crying?”

“Why does this matter so much to you, Fishlegs? If she doesn't like me, I can't force her to. I'll get over it,” Hiccup said as he leaned against the wall.

“I think I might now why she was so upset, but I'm not quite sure yet. I need more information. Was she crying or experiencing mood swings?” Fishlegs continued.

“She was crying, but I don't know if she was having mood swings. That's not really any of my business. Why?”

“What did she drink when you were there? Was her appetite larger than usual?” Fishlegs' face scrunched up as he thought.

Hiccup blinked at him. “I don't know! She had a mocha, but as soon as she tried to drink it she ran to the bathroom. There was a new girl working there today, so maybe she added something wrong.”

Fishlegs shook his head slowly. “Or maybe…”

“Or maybe what?”

“Hiccup, I-I need to ask you something really personal,” Fishlegs said.

Hiccup frowned at his friend's strange behavior. “Okay, shoot.”

“D-Did you, uh, did you use protection when you, err, you know… spent the night with her?”

Hiccup's face went red. “W-what?! Frankie! That's not something you just ask someone!”

“Do you want my help or not, Hiccup? I didn't want to ask either, but I need to know before I can tell you my theory,” Fishlegs said.

Hiccup stammered for a minute. “O-of course I…” His face suddenly went blank. He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes widening. “No. I-I don't think I even h-had one with me. I didn't...what I am going to do, Fish? What if she's-“

“You can't force her to go through this alone. She's probably scared too, Hiccup. Heck, I'm scared for you. But I'll be here to help if you need it,” Fishlegs said softly.

Hiccup gave him a small, wavering smile. “Thanks, Fish.”

“But you should call her and make sure she's okay. If she is… pregnant with your baby, she would probably tell you.”

Hiccup nodded and pushed away from the wall. “Yeah, you're right. I-I'll call her right now.” He went into his room and closed the door behind him, his phone already in his hand. He scrolled through his contacts and clicked her name, then held the phone up to his ear. It rang once, then twice. Three times. Four.

“Hey, this is Astrid, I'm probably at a game right now so if you leave me a message I'll call you back as soon as I get the chance.”

Hiccup sighed and ended the call. He looked down at his phone, his heart hammering against his ribs and his mind racing.

What if Astrid was pregnant? Would they even be able to handle a baby? He couldn't just drop his job at Gobber's garage. He had been lucky that Gobber was a family friend, or he never would have gotten that job in the first place. And then there was the fact that he still had two years left of college. He, having inherited his mother's stubbornness, had spent years saving up to go to Berk University, knowing that they had an excellent computer program.

But he couldn't go to school, pursue a career in computer engineering, and raise a baby. He couldn't force Astrid to raise it alone either. There was no right answer, no guiding light as he sat on his bed, his knees drawn to his chest, tears welling up in his eyes. As a kid he had never left his tiny hometown, so he had kept himself hopeful with the thought that someday, someday he would travel the world. But he couldn't expect Astrid to endure a sixteen hour flight when she was irritable and seven months pregnant.

And his parents… How were they going to tell his parents? His dad would panic and probably find a way to guilt him into moving back home. His mother would cry and lock herself in a room (his old bedroom, knowing her) with all of their picture albums.

They would just have to find a way when the time came. Maybe he could work night shifts at the garage and take online classes once the baby was born. Then he would probably have to move in with Astrid, and her roommates, which would be hard. The apartments in their building were tiny, and definitely not meant to house four college students and a baby.

He unlocked his phone and opened the message app. He watched the blinking black line and thought, his mouth dry. He typed in a quick message with trembling fingers and sent it to Astrid.

_ Hey can we talk? _

Hiccup was working on one of his dragon sketches when his phone chimed. He watched, frozen, as the pencil fell from his fingers and rolled off of his desk. After a few moments he lunged for the phone and unlocked it.

_ One unread text message from Astrid. _

Oh God, she probably never wanted to see him again. She could be huge and in more pain than he could ever imagine because of him in a few months, so he wouldn't blame her.

_ Sorry about earlier. Whats up? _

Hiccup's eyes flickered over the text slowly. _ Are you okay? _

A few agonizing minutes had ticked by before she responded.

_ Yep _ .

That was it? Just yep? What the hell was that even supposed mean? His train of thought came to an abrupt crash when his phone chimed again.

_ Ruff wants to know if you're coming with everyone to the beach on Saturday. _

Fishlegs had mentioned something about a picnic at the beach a few days ago over lunch. Hiccup wasn't really a fan of swimming; he could never catch up to anyone else and he hated being treated like he an invalid. But Fish had been adamant about it, so he told him that he would think about going. Which his friend had taken as a yes.

_ Yeah. What about you? _

_ Maybe. _

_ Why? Too cool for a day with friends? _

Was it safe to think of himself as one of her friends, or was he still just a drunk hookup to her?

_ Maybe I just have other plans. You should be more concerned about your stupid nerd games than someone who is perfectly capable of taking care of herself. _

Okay, ouch. That one had hurt. 

_ Sorry. _

_ Me too. Bad day. _

_ Wanna come over and talk about it? _

There was no immediate response from her like Hiccup had expected. He chewed his lip anxiously as he waited. Had he gone too far with the friend thing after all?

_ Thanks but no. _

No. That meant she wasn't pregnant, right? Most girls would probably have wanted to talk about it. But then again, Astrid was unlike any other girl he had ever met.

He had so many questions, but no one to answer them.

* * *

_ Hiccup crouched in the saddle, his eyes narrowed at the ships ahead of him. He directed his dragon, Toothless  _ (yes he was pathetic enough to have named his dragon after his cat) _ , into a dive after them. _

_ I attack him! _

_ You’re on the same team, Tuffnut. Attacking Hiccup will only reduce your chance of getting back to Berk before Dagur. _

_ I attack him anyway! _

_ Fine. Hiccup dodges and fires back at you. The left head of your Zippleback is hit and you are forced to land, leaving only Hiccup and Snotlout to defend Berk from Dagur and his armada. _

_ Why did my character have to be named Snotlout? _

_ You were the one who chose that name, Scott. It's a Viking name. _

_ Yeah I knew that. I just wanted to make sure that you remembered, Fishface. _

_ Hiccup could see the small island in the distance, along the with the ships quickly closing in on it. The soldiers on the ship were armed to the teeth with axes, swords and crossbows with poisoned arrows. His chances of survival would have been slim if not for the Monstrous Nightmare behind him and his own Night Fury. He was close enough now that Dagur should have been able to hear Toothless' wings flapping over the waves crashing against the sides of the ship. Luckily he didn't. _

_ The plan was simple: distract Dagur and sink the flagship before he could order an attack on Hiccup and Snotlout. The other ships would turn back when they saw it go down a smothering wreak. _

_ Then Scott opened his big mouth and their plans went down in a smoking wreck. _

_ I order Hookfang to flame up and fire at the ship! _

_ Are you sure you want to do that, Scott? If Hookfang flames up and Dagur sees you before you can fire- _

_ Just do it, Fishface! _

_ Hiccup watched as the sails burst into flames. The fire licked at the mast and the beam fell, almost knocking him out of the sky. He cried out and clutched at the saddle, his foot slipping from the pedal mechanism that controlled Toothless' tail. For a second they plummeted toward the deck and the alerted soldiers standing there, their weapons poised for attack. Then he hauled himself back into the saddle and opened the tail fin. They shot into the sky, dodging arrow after arrow. _

_ Scott! What were you thinking?! He's going to get away now! _

_ Shut up, Hiccup! You weren't going to do anything so someone else had to be a man and do it. _

_ I was waiting for an opportunity to strike when he was distracted. _

_ Well your stupid opportunity wasn't coming fast enough. So I took care of it myself. If you don't like it, then you go after him alone. _

_ Fine. I will. At least I won't have to worry about your dragon lighting everything on fire! _

_ Hey! At least my dragon can actually fly away and get help without me! Yours is as much of a useless cripple as you are! _

And just like that the illusion was destroyed. Scott stood up and marched into his room. The door slammed behind him and they heard his stereo start blaring music.

“Whoa. Looks like it's someone's time of the month,” Tuff called from where he leaned against the side of the couch.

“Guys, come on. Let's just finish the game.” Fishlegs looked desperately between the two of them.

Hiccup shook his head and pushed himself to his feet. Cripple? Yeah right. “No, I need to call my mom anyways and remind her that I'mdropping Toothless up off for his appointment tomorrow morning,” he said.

Tuffnut threw an arm around Fishlegs' shoulders and grinned at him. Fishlegs gulped. “Looks like it's just you and me now, Fishy.”

Hiccup went into the kitchen and leaned against the counter as he lifted his phone to his ear. He drummed his fingers on the counter as it rang.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Mom. I just wanted to remind you that I'm coming by tomorrow morning to drop Toothless off,” he said.

“Alright dear. And how are you doing?”

Hiccup felt his breath hitch in his throat.  _ I’m doing great, Mom. I might have knocked up a stranger, who turned out to be my friend's sister’s best friend and our next door neighbor, and now I'll never know because she won't answer my calls. Congratulations, grandma! But don't ask for baby pictures because Astrid will never let me come within ten feet of her again. _

Hiccup shook his head and took a deep breath. “I… I'm doing great. School's good. I met a girl.” 

No, no, no, why had he said that?

“Oh that's wonderful, sweetheart! I'm sure she's absolutely lovely. Did you tell your father?” Valka chuckled.

“Oh she's something alright,” Hiccup said under his breath. “No, I didn't tell Dad. She's not… it's complicated.”

“How is it complicated? Love is a beautiful thing, Hiccup. Don't play with the girl's head,” his mother said.

“I'm not-never mind. How is Dad doing?” Hiccup asked.

“He's doing well. He just received a promotion and-oh! Here he is! Stoick, honey, Hiccup is on the phone.”

It was no wonder that Hiccup had a strange nickname looking at his father. Gerard Haddock had been known as Stoick for years because of his stony expression. Even after the fire that had resulted in the amputation of his at the time fifteen year old son's left leg, Stoick had remained composed. A bit shaken yes, but not near as terrified as Valka had been, seeing her baby lying under crisp white hospital sheets. She had held him and cried until a nurse had pulled her away at the end of visiting hours.

He heard his father grumble something, then his mother folded a hand over the phone. Their voices were muffled, but Hiccup could tell by his mother's pleading tone that they were arguing. Again. The reason for why he had chosen to move out a week after he had graduated.

“I'll call him later, Val. I'm meeting Gobber in a few minutes,” he heard his father say.

“Stoick. He is your only son. Just talk to him for a few minutes. That is all I ask of you,” his mother sighed.

“I do talk to him!” his father argued.

“When? When was the last time you talked to him? When we helped him move boxes into his new apartment, which he rented to get away from us?”

“There is nothing for us to talk about, Val.”

“And why is that, Stoick? He is our only son and you never speak to him. I don't want him to think that you don't love him because I know you do-“

“We are different people. I have my job and you. He has… he has crazy ideas that only result in trouble. I always told you that we should have never let him stay with your father. The man is insane,” his father said.

“Don't you dare bring my father into this, Gerard! This is about you and how much you avoid your son! He loves you and you push him away. All for some stupid job. What will you do if something happens to him? How will you feel?” his mother asked, her voice cracking.

“Well maybe you should go stay with him instead if you are so worried that he's unloved! My life would certainly be easier if you did!” his father yelled.

Silence. Hiccup heard his mother choke out a sob, the hand covering the speaker falling. He hung up, a lump forming in his own throat. He dropped his phone on his bed and ran a hand over his face.

He put his phone in the back pocket of his jeans and stood up. He walked back into the living room where Fishlegs and Tuff were still arguing over whether or not Tuff could attack someone on his own side in the game and retook his spot on the floor. Scott's music was still blaring from across the hallway. Hiccup could hear the faint clink of metal on metal over the stereo and guessed that he was bench pressing. Typical.

“Really, Tuff, you aren't seeing my point. If you attack someone on your side, then they fight back and your own strength is weakened, meaning that it is easier for the enemy to defeat you,” Fishlegs said.

Tuff gave him a blank look. “But if they fight back doesn't that make them an enemy too?”

Fishlegs groaned. “No, they're not. The same people are always on your side.”

“So no explosions?”

Fishlegs smiled and folded his hands in his lap. “No explosions.”

“This is lame. I'm gonna go find the she-beast,” Tuff announced as he stood up. He crossed the kitchen and left the apartment, the door slamming behind him.

Fishlegs sighed and started to put everything away. He noticed Hiccup and stopped, someone's character sheet held in his hand.

“Are you alright, Hiccup?” the blond boy asked softly.

Hiccup nodded and drew his knees to his chest. He rested his chin on them, his gaze burning into the far wall. Fishlegs watched him sadly, unsure of what to say.

“Did you ever get an answer from Astrid?” he asked after a long stretch of heavy silence.

“No.”

“Oh. Did you try texting her?” Fishlegs asked.

“She said she doesn't want to talk about it,” Hiccup said.

“Did she say why not?”

“No, she just said that I should be more concerned about my stupid nerd games,” Hiccup grumbled.

Fishlegs nodded and stood up with the Dungeons & Dragons box in his arms. Three character sheets were held under his arm. Looking down at them, he suddenly had an idea. “You should invite her to our next Dungeons & Dragons night!”

Hiccup looked up at him, his green eyes wide. “Are you insane, Frankie?! She would laugh in my face!”

“Maybe not.” Fishlegs shrugged. “Just think about it. You could ask her at the beach on Saturday. If she has fun, then it will be a great way you two to get to know each other. I mean, you might be raising a child together, so you don't really have a choice anyway-“

“Fish.”

“Sorry. If she doesn't like it, then at least you can say you tried. You won't know until you ask her, Hiccup. She might surprise you.”

Hiccup watched his friend disappear into his bedroom to put everything back into his closet. While he was gone, he thought about what it would be like to have someone other than Fishlegs, Scott, and Tuff in their apartment. Other than Ruffnut and Scott's girlfriends, they had never had a girl in the apartment. And never one invited by Hiccup. But there was no harm in asking, right?


	5. Imperfect

Astrid had not slept in three days. She sat at the counter, her laptop open in front of her and a glass of water sitting next to it. Yes, water. After the incident in the coffee shop, she was not taking a chance with anything else. Her fingers remained frozen over the keys as she watched the blinking black line. Everything she had spent the last three nights thinking about, planning, seemed pointless.

  
How was she supposed to tell her parents through an email that a stranger had gotten her pregnant? And that he came nowhere near the expectations they had set for her? 

  
Astrid's mother, Ingrid Hofferson, was a kind woman. Loving, selfless, and proud. The picture wife and mother that you only see in magazines. But she still saw Astrid as the girl she had once been. Prom queen, varsity volleyball team captain, and teacher's pet. In a word, perfect.

  
Except she had not been that girl since Scott broke up with her for a pretty junior. She had realized that day that she didn't boys or money or popularity if she had friends that loved her for who she was. And then she had met the Thorston twins who, although crazy, accepted her.

  
Her father was an entirely different book. Astrid had always been closer to him than her mother because of how calm he was. He loved her, but he didn't set impossible standards that she had to jump to come even close to reaching. He had been at every game, taken her picture with Scott before every dance, and been her rock when the other girls had pushed her away. She couldn't bring herself to tell him and shatter the image he held of her. Her mother would be disappointed, yes, but her father would be genuinely hurt.

  
She closed the email and shut her laptop. There was no way to tell them without meeting in person. It would only hurt them more if she did it through an email.

  
“You know, we should probably get going soon if we're gonna meet up with the guys,” Ruffnut said as she came into the kitchen. The straps of her purple swimsuit were visible through the neck of her t-shirt and she held a bag filled with towels, water bottles, and sunscreen.

  
Astrid stood, nodding. She undid her braid as she walked into her bedroom. She undressed and threw all of her swimsuits on her bed. Each one seemed to taunt her, telling her that pregnant college students didn't deserve to have fun, that she was too fat to pull of


	6. Unlucky Seven

Hiccup smiled at Astrid as he held the door open for her. She took a cautious step inside his apartment, her eyes scanning the living room. He closed the door behind her and watched as she examined the Spider-Man comic that Fishlegs had left on the table. He rushed forward and grabbed it from her with a nervous laugh.

  
“Sorry, that's Frankie's. He's, uh, not the best about keeping them in his room. You know, I'm gonna go see what's taking them so long,” he said. He went into Fishlegs' room and threw the comic at the boy, who was reading a book in his bed.    
“Hey, be careful with that! That is the new Maximum Carnage foil cover issue!” The blond boy said, catching the comic and setting it gently on a shelf that held hundreds of comics already and looked close to falling.

  
“She's here,” Hiccup hissed. He looked back at Astrid and gave her a small smile. She waved.

  
“What? Already?! But I haven't even started to set everything up! There is no way we can put her character together with such little time, Hiccup!” Fish gasped.

  
“Well, we don't really have a choice. Do you know where Scott and Tuff are?” Hiccup asked.

  
“They left with Ruff a while ago. I think Scott said something about heading to the park.”

  
Hiccup sighed and went back into the living room. Astrid looked up at him from where she sat on the couch. “Great.”

  
“What?” She asked.

  
“It's just going to be you, me, and Fish this time. But that should be fine. What were you thinking of for your character?”

  
“Oh.” Astrid handed him a piece of folded paper. “Here. I put my character sheet together last night.”

  
He nodded as he unfolded the paper and read her neatly slanted handwriting. “Wow. This is amazing. And your dragon is a Deadly Nadder? Hmm. Protective, deadly and beautiful. Very fitting.”

  
Astrid blushed. “Thanks. I based her off of Stormfly.”

  
“Well you did a great job for someone so new to Dungeons & Dragons,” Hiccup said. 

  
He set her character sheet down on the table and sat down on the floor in front of the couch. He kept his eyes trained on his hands as he spoke, “But, there's something else that I really think we should talk about-“

  
“Who's ready for an amazing game of Dungeons & Dragons!” Fishlegs came into the living room, a large box in his arms. He set it down and sat next to Hiccup, who mumbled something under his breath as Fishlegs started to take things out of the box. “Because I know I am.”

  
Astrid frowned. “Hiccup, what were you going to say?”

  
Fishlegs stopped what he was doing and looked between the two of them. “Did I interrupt something here…?”

  
Hiccup rubbed the back of his neck. “No, no nothing. I just, uh, wanted to show you some pictures I have of Toothless.”

  
Astrid nodded. “Sure. Where are they?”

  
Hiccup stood and led her down the hall to his bedroom. He heard Fishlegs snicker as he shut the door behind them. Astrid looked around his room, her blue eyes lingering particularly long on one of the dragon sketches he had taped up. She traced the smooth pencil lines with a finger and smiled.

  
“Did you draw these?” She asked.

  
“Yeah. I did.” Hiccup leaned against his desk as she turned around to look at him. She frowned when she saw his darkened features, and crossed her arms over her chest defensively. 

  
“There aren't any pictures, are there?” Astrid asked quietly. 

  
Hiccup shook his head. Her eyes fell to the floor and she took a step away from him, towards the door.

  
“Astrid, look, I think you're great and all. But there's something that we really need to talk about before we can try this whole friends thing, and I'm pretty sure you know what it is,” Hiccup admitted.

  
Astrid kept her head lowered, her arms hugging her sides tightly like she was trying to keep herself from falling apart into a million pieces. “I don't know what you're talking about, Hiccup.” 

  
“Astrid, you never told me what made you sick when we got coffee that day.”

  
She froze for a minute, then spoke calmly, “The girl working there was new.”

  
“Heather told me that she saw you throw up in the woods when we went to the beach,” he continued.

  
Astrid took another step toward the door. “Well Heather shouldn’t be watching me so closely anyway. And neither should you. I'm fine. Fishlegs is waiting; we should get back to the game-“

  
Hiccup grabbed her shoulders and turned her so she faced him. She glared at him but kept her lips pursed. “Astrid, tell me what is going on. I promise that I will never bother you again if you just tell me.”

  
Her eyes searched his face. Slowly her scowl faded and her eyes softened. “Promise me again.”

  
“Promise you what?”

  
“That you won't leave me,” she whispered. “I… I don't have anyone else to turn to.”

  
It all clicked into place with her words. Hiccup let go of her and ran a hand through his hair. He backed into the edge of his desk and stared blankly at her. “How long?”

  
She was hesitant to reply. “Seven weeks.”

  
Hiccup's eyes widened slightly. His fingernails dug into the wooden desk. “And you didn't think about telling me?! I am just as much a part of this as you are, Astrid!”

  
Astrid narrowed her eyes at him and reached for the doorknob. “I'm leaving.”

  
Hiccup stepped in front of the door and put his full weight against it. ”No. You don't get to just run off like that again. I need answers. This is our baby, and we should have an equal say in how it will be raised.”

  
“Yeah, well I don't want this kid, so you can keep it!” Astrid pushed at him but he didn't move. “Get out of my way!”

  
“Do you have any idea how scared I was, Astrid? Or were you too busy worrying about raising our baby without me to care?” Hiccup asked. He watched her expression change to something closely resembling hurt. Her eyes glazed over with tears.

  
Her hand flashed out and connected with his cheek. “You bastard! You have no idea how hard this has been for me! I have been worried about telling you since I first found out! And I still have to tell my parents! How do you think they will feel when they find out that they paid for their only daughter to go to some fancy school and she ended up getting knocked up by a drunk stranger? How do you think they will view me after that, huh?” Astrid screamed. Tears welled up in her eyes and spilled in eyeliner-darkened rivers down her cheeks.

  
Hiccup rested a hand on her shoulder. His eyes took on a softer look. “Astrid, I'm sorry-“

  
She shrugged his hand off and turned away. “Did you ever stop and think that maybe I don't want this either? Because I don't. I was supposed to finish school and get my degree, maybe get married, but I can't do that now. You still can. In a few months, everyone is going to know about this, and I will never lose whatever title they decide to give me. That's why I didn't want to tell you. I don't want you to think that you're stuck with me now.” A choked sob left Astrid’s lips. 

  
Hiccup took a step toward her, his eyes lowered. “I-I never thought that you would try to protect me like that. But Astrid, I'm not going to force you to go through this alone. We got ourselves into this situation together.”

  
She shook her head but didn't turn around, her fists trembling at her sides. She wiped vigorously at her cheeks with the back of her hand. Hiccup took another step.

  
“Let me-“

  
“No! I-I'm perfectly capable of t-taking care of myself, Hiccup,” Astrid said. 

  
“Astrid, I don't want you to do this alone. I want to be there-“

  
She whirled around. Her icy blue eyes pierced him in a glare that made him shrink back against the door. “Just get out of my way, Hiccup. You can go back to your stupid nerd games and you'll never hear from me again. You should be glad that I'm even giving you that option.”

  
She reached for the doorknob but he pushed her hand away. She paused for a moment before elbowing him in the ribs. Hiccup groaned and stumbled away from the door, watching as she threw it open and stalked down the hall. He heard Fishlegs squeak and scurry off to his room as he hurried after the blonde.

  
“Astrid, wait!” He called.

  
She ignored him and turned the corner into the living room, where her crisp character sheet still sat on the table, forgotten. She stepped over the large cardboard box and made her way to the door. 

  
Hiccup's metal prosthetic caught on the corner of the couch and left him sprawling on the floor as the door slammed behind her. He grabbed a couch cushion and hauled himself to his feet, his bruised abdomen screaming in protest. He opened the door and scanned the hall, spotting her near the stairs. He jogged after her. 

  
“Hey!”

  
Her eyes met his for a brief moment, then returned to the dark green carpet under feet.

  
“Please, just give me one minute. And then I swear that I will never talk to you again if that's what you want.”

  
Astrid stopped. She looked over at him with puffy red eyes, tears streaking down her cheeks. She waited for him at the top of the stairs as he ran over.

  
He gave her a small lopsided smile but she didn't return it. He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Look, I’m sorry about what I said. I just... I-I'm scared, Astrid. I have no idea what I'm doing here,” he admitted.

  
She nodded, her braid falling over her shoulder. “Me too. And I don't think you're a nerd. Geek, maybe.”

  
Hiccup laughed and let his hand fall back to his side. His expression became serious again when his eyes met hers. “But I want you to know that I'll be there for you. I don't want you to go through this alone.” 

  
She gave him a weak smile. “T-Thanks. You're a great friend, Hiccup.”

  
Astrid pulled him into a hug. Hiccup rested his head on top of hers and smiled at the wallpaper with its plain floral print, his heart thrumming against his ribcage. He took a deep breath and tried to ignore the cold knife that stabbed his chest when she spoke.


	7. She's All That

_2 months, 3 weeks and four days_

Growing up, Hiccup had been a lonely boy. He had never been able to find his place among his peers. They partied and he played video games in his basement. They went out on dates and he went down the street to the comic book store. They were cool and he just wasn't.

Frankie Ingerman was his first human friend. He had met him in the department store where the blond boy worked. They had discussed everything from four-winged dragons to the most beautiful girls on campus, who they both knew they would never have a chance with. Frankie had offered to let Hiccup stay in his apartment, and the boy had agreed.

And then the Gods had decided that Hiccup was worthy of their wrath and sent a blue-eyed goddess to the empty check out lane where they had been talking.

Hiccup had gaped silently at her for at least a full minute before she cleared her throat and turned her icy glare on him. He snapped his mouth shut and trained his eyes on the floor, both terrified that this woman was capable of destroying him with her bare hands and in awe of her unearthly beauty.

The woman had rolled her eyes, pink lips pursued, and looked back at Frankie. The boy straightened up and gulped.

"Where can I find spandex shorts?" She sighed.

Frankie sputtered incoherently for a moment. "S-Spandex?" He squeaked.

The woman groaned and pushed her blonde fringe from her eyes. She narrowed her eyes at the cashier. "Look, I have volleyball practice tonight and I need those shorts. If you're just going to stand there and ogle me I'll go somewhere else."

Hiccup bit his lip. It was impossible to not imagine her wearing a pair of skin tight spandex shorts and running around the court, especially not with the way she was bending over the counter, giving him an excellent view of her perfect-

Nope. Definitely not going there.

He cleared his throat and looked around the store. Other than an elderly couple looking at garden tools, the store was empty. The doors were only a few feet away, maybe he could make a run for it and call Frankie later. But that would be almost impossible with what little traction his prosthetic provided.

The woman's eyes flashed at him. She looked him up and down and muttered something under her breath before turning back to Frankie, who pointed a shaking finger in the direction of the women's clothing department. She wasted no time in stomping away, although her anger was lost on Hiccup when he noticed the feminine sway of her hips.

The whole ordeal had lasted only three minutes yet she never left his mind. She sat in front of him in mythology, she lived across the hall from him with his roommate's sister, she always appeared at his favorite coffee shop. Wherever he went, she was there, whether it be in his thoughts or standing just across the room. He never once forgot about her during his first year at college, despite the fact that there was no way anything could work out between them.

And then something changed over the summer. He had met another girl, Cara, and things became ultimately better. She was so much like the girl from his mythology class; blonde, blue eyes, insanely smart, beautiful, terrifying. Cara loved to live her life on the razor's edge. She had always dragged Hiccup along on her adventures, and they had never turned out well. Once his mom had to bail him out of the police station after his crazy girlfriend took him to some party of hers. Things had never been the same after that.

But she was still his first girlfriend. She had defended him when Scott commented on his thin form. She never took shit from anyone, not even Hiccup, and he admired that about her. But she wasn't the girl from 13A.

They broke up after Cara found out that he still had feelings for his neighbor. She had declared that if he couldn't promise all of himself to her, she didn't want any of him. And then she had left and he never heard back from her. Of course he had tried calling, but she never answered. He had spent weeks mourning her despite how much stress their relationship had caused and how free he felt without her. But she had been his everything. His first kiss, the first girl in his bed, and even the first girl to smile at him. She would always have her own special place in his heart because of those things.

And now, sitting at his usual window table in the local coffee shop, he realized that he missed her. He missed how independent she had been, how she hid her problems and took care of them herself. It was horrible to compare her to Astrid, but he couldn't help it. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, or rather, an angry pregnant woman and the rest of his life.

Things would be so different with a baby. It would be almost impossible to continue living in their respective apartments. They would probably have to move into their own, but that would cost money that they didn't have. Hiccup made barely enough at the garage to cover his part of the rent now and that was when three other guys were also pitching in.

And there was also the fact that he had never taken care of someone else before, other than his drunk friends. He had never even held a baby. What if he dropped it? What if Astrid decided she wanted to take care of things alone and left? What if he messed up so terribly that he made his own dad look like the picture father figure?

Hiccup sighed and took a sip of his coffee. He looked out the window and watched solemnly as a young woman pushed a stroller down the sidewalk. The man walking beside her had his arm around her waist and was saying something to her. They both laughed as they disappeared around the corner.

He looked down at his foam cup and thought. They couldn't have been much older than he and Astrid were. Was that what they would look like in a few months? So lost in their own happiness that they often forgot about the world around them?

Was that really what he wanted?

Sure, Astrid was beautiful and the thought of moving in with her made him grin like an idiot, but knowing that he would be a dad in a few months… he just wasn't ready for that kind of responsibility. He didn't want to repeat his own father's mistakes.

Hiccup reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He set it on the table and scrolled through his contact list, stopping when he came across a familiar face. It was a picture of Astrid on the day they all went to the beach, smiling and sticking her tongue out at him. The sunlight captured the gold in her wet hair and made it glisten like that of a goddess.

He smiled at the memory. Astrid had sat by their things for most of the day after she agreed to come over for Dungeons & Dragons. The twins saw this and dragged her into the water, and Ruffnut had held her underwater until she punched the other girl in the ribs and she was forced to let go. After that Astrid had stormed back onto the sand and glared at them. Later on Hiccup took a picture of her so that if "something happened on Saturday they would know who had killed him." She had laughed and punched his shoulder but said nothing.

Who would have thought things would take such a drastic turn? Hiccup still couldn't believe that she was talking to him, let alone carrying his baby. She was so different from all the other girls he had met, and he loved that about her.

There was no comparison between her and Cara. They were two entirely different women; one built up walls to keep everyone else out and the other invited them in with a smile. The difference was night and day; life and death; love and hate.

And that right there was his problem. He couldn't both love and hate someone, just as you can not have night and day at once. There was no choosing between them. He could only accept what he had and move forward. But where did he go when the only place he could go was back?

* * *

Astrid was an enduring woman. A bit stubborn and hard-headed at times, yes, but no less enduring. She prided herself in being able to handle any situation life threw at her.

So when she got a text from Heather about the big game that night, she wasn't worried. For the most part anyway.

She had read articles online about women that had miscarried after overexerting themselves in physical activities, like sports. Of course those women had been 4-5 months pregnant and running marathons or playing soccer, but did it make a difference? No matter the precautions she took, there would still be a chance of something happening, and there was no way she could ever play volleyball again if something did. Not to mention the fact that everyone would know about she and Hiccup.

And that was another thing. She liked him, like really really liked him, but she didn't want anyone else to know. She didn't want to hear their comments, or be rejected by her team for giving up her freedom for some geek.

Hiccup was a great guy. He was honest, cute, his puns made her laugh (especially the science ones), and he accepted her in ways that no one else ever had. But she didn't love him. He was just too different; they hardly had anything to talk about other than the obvious. Maybe someday she would, but until then she would be happy just being one of his friends.

But what about him? He had been avoiding her since she told him; two weeks ago. He had stayed in his room when she went over to his apartment with Ruffnut. When she called the next day, worried, he had cut the call short by saying that he was visiting his parents. He had ignored all of her texts and calls after that.

She probably had no reason to be worried. He was just adjusting. Soon he would call and things would go back to normal. Yes, that sounded exactly like something he would do.

But was it? What did she know about him anyway? She knew that his favorite color was green and his love to sketch had started when he moved with his parents to Nevada, and he had spent all of his time outside of school attempting to draw the trees in their backyard and the neighbor's dog. She knew that he hated his real name because it was a family name and he just couldn't live up to his great grandfather's accomplishments. She knew that his favorite season was summer because he had grown up in Scotland, where the winter weather was always unpredictable. But other than that he could be a perfect stranger.

She didn't know his middle name, or the reason why his family moved around so much. She didn't know why he was so distant from his parents. She didn't know how he had lost his leg. Those were some of the most important things she should know about him and she didn't.

And for some wild reason unknown to her she grabbed her phone off of the coffee table in front of the couch and scrolled through her contacts until she found his name. She held the phone to her ear and bit her lip.

The phone rang on the other end. And rang. And rang. Finally there was a beep and a recorded message of his voice was playing into her ear.

_"Hi, it's Hiccup, leave me a message and I'll call you back later."_

It was so nice to hear his voice again, even though it was a recording. Astrid frowned and ended the call. She fought with herself for a moment before sending him a quick text and setting the phone back down. She went into her bedroom to change into her uniform.

* * *

Hiccup watched as his phone lit up in his hand, Astrid's pretty face smiling at him. It continued to ring for a minute before it went silent. He sighed and stood from his desk chair, where he had been working on one of his dragon sketches.

His phone chimed with a new text. He unlocked the screen and read it, his heart sinking into the cold pit of his stomach like a dead weight.

_I'm sorry._

Hiccup leaned against his desk. He had been avoiding her, yes, but the last thing he had wanted to do was cause her any pain. In fact, he had been hoping that she would just forget him all together and move on. Find someone who could make her happy.

He swallowed hard and typed out a response with numb fingers. He stared at the screen for a moment before sending it. He waited, but there was no response from Astrid. He turned his phone off and slid it back into his pocket.

He couldn't just stand there and let her suffer. But what was there for him to do at that point? She probably hated him, not that he would blame her if she did. Somehow he had to find a way to make it up to her. Suddenly he remembered. He unlocked his phone and started to type out a text to Ruffnut.

* * *

Astrid grimaced when she saw the scoreboard. DRAGONS 4 – BOG BURGLARS 9 it read. It was by far their worst game of the season. Her heart banged against her ribcage as she crouched and bumped the ball back into the air. Behind her, the crowd cheered.

On the other side of the net, Camicazi smirked. She crouched and watched one of her teammates launch the ball over the net again. Her blue eyes flicked to Astrid, silently mocking her.

Astrid grit her teeth and looked back at the girls behind her.

Her eyes fell on a figure standing near the blue double doors, his hands shoved in his pockets. He gave her his trademark lopsided grin and waved.

For a moment, Astrid was in shock. The world around her, the cheering crowd and her teammates arguing, melted away. It was like she had been pushed underwater, the noise becoming a low buzz in the back of her mind, but she hadn't moved. She smiled back at him.

Hiccup's face suddenly paled. His emerald eyes widened and he took a step forward, yelling and pointing.

Astrid's brow furrowed as she watched him. She turned around and could only watch as the ball smacked into the side of her head, the force sending her to the ground. Her head cracked back against the floor hard enough to make her vision go out of focus. There was a warm copper taste in her mouth as someone wearing a Dragons uniform rushed forward and placed a hand on her cheek, Hiccup's familiar face disappearing behind her back. Then everything went dark.


	8. Drawing the Line

_3 months_

Astrid blinked her eyes open slowly, the bright light slanting through the window blinding her for a few seconds. As her eyes adjusted, she scanned the bright room, her mouth going dry. White was all she saw; the sheets, the floor, the walls.

It didn't take her more than a few seconds to realize that she was in a hospital room.

The obnoxious beeping of the machine next to the bed caught her attention. Her eyes followed the tube attached to it to her right hand, where an IV needle had been put in her second finger, white medical tape holding it in place.

"You're awake."

Astrid's head snapped around too quickly, and pain bloomed in her skull. She raised her hand to rub the sore spot as she looked at the man sitting in the chair next to the window.

Hiccup smiled at her as he stood and came to the bedside. There were purple shadows under his eyes, a clear sign that he hadn't slept in days. He took her free hand in his and smoothed his thumb over the back of it.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

Astrid shook her head. Her eyebrows pulled together in confusion. "What are you doing here? What happened?" She croaked.

"The nurse should be back soon with the results of your CT scan. Shell be glad to see that you're awake."

"What are you doing here? What am I doing in this bed? What are you not telling me, Hiccup?" Astrid asked. She could have sworn that her heart skipped a beat when he hesitated.

Hiccup sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Someone on the other team hit the ball over the net and it… it hit you pretty hard. You were unconscious when I got to you."

Astrid's head fell back against the pillow. She closed her eyes. "How long was I out?"

"Almost three days. They put you on morphine, so you'll probably still be tired for another day or two."

Her eyes shot open. She struggled to sit up, and the IV was disconnected from the needle in her hand. The machine in the corner of the room wailed.

Hiccup grabbed her wrists and held them against the mattress. Astrid jerked and kneed him in the stomach, taking pleasure in the pained groan he emitted. She growled when he refused to let go, hunched forward to protect himself from further injury.

"Let me go, Hiccup!" Astrid argued.

"No. Do you have any idea what a fall like that could have done to your head?" Hiccup asked. "Because I do, and I'm not about to let you walk out of here like everything is fine."

Astrid fumed at him. "Fuck. You."

"Don't even-"

"Astrid Hofferson?"

Astrid sat up and Hiccup released her wrists. She watched as the nurse reattached the IV to the needle and silenced the machine. The woman's eyes were a warm shade of chocolate that matched the maternal smile on her lips.

"I have good news and bad news," she said. "Which would you like to hear first?"

"Good," Astrid said softly.

"Well, there doesn't appear to be any damage caused by the fall. But it is recommended that you stay off your feet for the next few days just in case something does arise that we missed," the nurse said.

"And the bad?" Astrid asked.

"I assume that you play sports often?"

Astrid nodded.

"Even though you are now in the second trimester of your pregnancy, athletics still pose a large threat to your baby. If you would have fallen that hard on your front, the baby would surely have been killed. Now, I have no way of knowing if you will listen or not, but it is very important that you do not get involved in contact sports. It is also recommended that you see an contact your gynecologist about an ultrasound to check on your baby. If you would like, I can schedule an appointment for Wednesday the 18th with..." The woman glanced down at her clipboard. "...Dr. Anderson."

Astrid took a deep breath and nodded again, unable to speak.

The nurse gave her a small smile and clutched her clipboard a bit tighter. "Good. You will be released shortly."

Astrid watched her go, a frown on her lips.

* * *

An uncomfortable silence hung over them during car ride back to their apartment complex. It was suffocating, stealing all of the words she wanted to speak and throwing them up in the air where she couldn't each them.

Hiccup drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and kept his eyes on the road, pretending to not notice when Astrid glanced at him for the fourth time in fifteen minutes.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, looking down at her hands.

Hiccup finally looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "Don't be. I… I should have called you back. I was being a jerk."

"I thought you were going to leave me."

"I thought you were going to be the one leaving me."

Astrid looked up at him, blonde eyebrows knit together over stormy blue eyes. "What?"

Hiccup tapped his fingers on the wheel nervously. "Uh, yeah. I mean, I-I could see why you wouldn't want to spend the rest of your life with this." He gestured vaguely to himself with his right hand.

"That's not true, Hiccup. I don't plan on letting you go anywhere anytime soon," Astrid said.

Hiccup looked over at her, a small smile on his lips. "Are you-"

"Hiccup!" Astrid grabbed the wheel as it slipped from his fingers. He blinked and gripped it in both hands, his eyes once again trained on the road ahead of them.

"Sorry."

Astrid sighed and watched as the trees and houses shot by in a blur. "Tell me about yourself," she said finally.

"O-Okay. What do you want to know?"

"Anything."

Hiccup thought for a moment. "Well, Toothless is missing his left hind leg. I got him a year after I lost my foot, and we just kind of… clicked."

"How did you lose your foot?" Astrid asked.

Hiccup swallowed audibly. "T-There was an accident. I was walking home from school and the driver… he didn't see me. The girl who saw it happen thought he was drunk," he said quietly.

"I'm sorry," she said.

Hiccup shook his head. "No, I've moved past it. It's just part of who I am now, and there's nothing I can do to change it."

Astrid nodded.

Hiccup glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "What about you?"

Astrid shrugged her shoulders. "Well, I have an older brother, Finn, and a younger sister, Brenna. What else?"

"Why did you move here of all places?" Hiccup asked. He carefully turned onto the main road.

"It's different. At home, everyone… they all expected me to fit this perfect mold. And I didn't. So I lied and pretended to be someone else. My friends wanted to hang out with that girl instead of me. My parents wanted me to follow in their footsteps and take over the family business. That's not the future I want. I want… I want to live; to see the world before I give it all up and settle down for the rest of my life."

"It's not fair."

Astrid looked over at him, surprised. "No. No, it's not."

"You wish you had a second chance to make things right. The way you think they should be; not someone else."

She frowned. "But there are no second chances," she whispered to herself.

"There are if you let yourself believe there are."

She leaned her head on her hand and looked out the window. She shook her head. "I just don't know what to do anymore, Hiccup. There are no right turns. Everything move I have made is wrong," she said.

Hiccup looked over at her as he parked the car in the lot next to their apartment complex. "Then take a left turn. There is always another way, Astrid. Always."

"How can you be so sure?" Astrid asked. She glanced at Hiccup, a frown tugging at her lips.

Hiccup gave her a small smile but kept his eyes trained on the console between them. He hesitated before reaching over it to place his hand over her smaller one. "Do you trust me, Astrid?"

She intertwined her fingers with his. "Of course," she said.

"Then don't question it."

Astrid undid her seatbelt and turned in her seat to face him, never letting go of his hand. She folded her knees under her and glanced out the window behind him at the quickly darkening sky.

"I missed this," she admitted quietly.

"Missed what?" Hiccup asked as he took off his own seatbelt.

"You. Us. Not feeling so alone." Astrid sighed and gazed down at their hands, chewing her lip. "Things are so screwed up right now that I don't even know where to start."

He nodded. "Look, I'm sorry about everything I said, and everything I didn't say but should have. You mean a lot to me, Astrid. I don't want to ruin whatever friendship there is between us."

"It's not your fault, Hiccup. I… I said a lot of things that I shouldn't have too. And I'm sorry. I was angry and scared and… I let my emotions get the best of me. Instead of talking to you, I took it out on you," Astrid said. She looked outside again, her eyes following a stray pink cloud as it floated across the sky over the setting sun.

The last few days of sunlight streaked across the parking lot as the sun set on the other side of the city. The windows of their apartment building were painted orange and purple as the sun slowly fell and disappeared beyond the horizon.

"Do you regret it?"

Astrid glanced at Hiccup, trying to ignore the cold fear building in the dark corners of her mind. "What?"

"Everything that has happened over the past two months."

Was it possible to even answer such a question? Astrid swallowed hard and shook her head, her gaze falling to their hands. "No. I wish it had gone differently, yes, but I don't regret any of it. How else would I have met you?"

Her eyes met his emerald ones as she finished speaking, her breath hitching in her throat when she saw the different emotions in them. Happiness. Relief. Uncertainty.

Hiccup gave her a small smile and glanced down at their hands. Then he leaned over the console, so close that Astrid could smell his woodsy cologne and feel his breath on her cheek. Her eyes widened as he pressed his lips to hers.

She was motionless as his lips molded against hers, her heart hammering against her ribcage. A voice in her head screamed at her to move, to do something, but she remained frozen.

He pulled away after a minute, looking anywhere but her face. He slid back into his seat and grabbed his keys, running the back of his neck. "Uh… yeah, I should probably…"

Astrid nodded too and got out of the car. They crossed the parking and she followed him to their level, then stopped in front of her door, her keys dangling from her fingers As she thought.

What did she even want anymore? She liked Hiccup and all, but where were they in their relationship? Where did she draw the line between boy friend and boyfriend? Were they even ready for such a big step?

In only six months they would be tied together forever, and that was hardly enough time. But with Hiccup there by her side, things would be different. She had more fun with him in one day than she did in a whole month with anyone else. He was the only one that knew the way when she was lost.

Astrid shoved her keys in her pocket and turned around. She scanned the hallway and found him standing in front of his door, trying to unlock it.

"Hiccup!" She called.

His eyebrows knit together as she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him, his back hitting the door. He slowly relaxed against her and kissed back, his arms finding their way around her waist.

"You're not getting rid of me that easily," she teased as they parted.

"Why would I ever want to get rid of you?" Hiccup asked, his emerald eyes taking on a playful look as he leaned against his door.

Astrid smacked his chest half-heartedly and rolled her eyes. "Just shut up up and kiss me, nerd," she said.

Hiccup gave her his trademark lopsided grin as he pressed their foreheads together. "Gladly."


	9. Rhythm of My Heartbeat

_3 months, 3 weeks and 1 day._

Astrid woke up to an empty apartment that morning, something she was thankful for. She didn't need Ruffnut and Heather teasing her about Hiccup while she got ready, not when she was already on edge about her appointment that morning.

She stood in front of the mirror in the bathroom, dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a light blue t-shirt, braiding her hair over her left shoulder. Her eyes fell to her abdomen as she finished the braid and twisted a hair tie around the end. There was already a small bump forming between her hips, just large enough to show through her shirt.

It was startling to see it. She had been wearing sweatshirts and loose t-shirts since she had started to show a few weeks ago, but now that she would be away from the apartment for most of the day, there was no point in hiding it.

Astrid lifted her shirt and hesitantly placed a hand over it, feeling the subtle curve of firm flesh under her palm. She breathed a laugh and glanced at her reflection, amazed by how _right_ it both looked and felt.

Astrid let the hem of her shirt fall back into place when there was a knock at the door. She glanced at her reflection one last time before grabbing her phone and car keys and jogging to the door.

Hiccup grinned at her when she opened the door. "Hey," he said.

Astrid smiled back as she pulled the door shut behind her. She crossed her arms as they began the short walk to the stairs. "Hey. So… are you ready?"

He nodded. "Well, yeah. We're going to see our baby for the first time today. It would be hard to not to be excited."

"I just hope that everything is okay," Astrid sighed. She followed Hiccup down the stairs and outside to her car. She opened her door and climbed into the car as Hiccup ran around to the other side. "What do you want? A boy or girl?"

"Anything alive and healthy," he said.

Astrid smiled to herself as she backed out of her parking spot. "I wouldn't mind having a boy. Girls are too hard," she laughed.

"Yeah.."

The rest of the drive to the clinic was quiet. Hiccup turned on the radio at one point, and they both laughed at the horrible song playing. After that neither of them said much, but the silence between them wasn't uncomfortable.

Astrid bit her lip as she pulled the key from the ignition and looked up at the building in front of them. It was simple; a large picture window that looked out into the parking lot in front, a few trees that offered little shade but hid the clinic away from the road.

"We don't have to do this if you aren't ready yet, Astrid. We can reschedule-"

Astrid shook her head and opened her door. "No. I-I want to. I'm ready now," she said.

Astrid made her way inside and to the desk, where a short woman with dark hair was scribbling something down on a note pad. She glanced up when Astrid rested her hands on the desk, Hiccup awkwardly glancing around the waiting room behind her. A few older women gave them odd looks, but said nothing.

"Name?" The secretary asked.

Astrid leaned forward a bit, feeling the women's eyes burning into the back of her head. "Astrid Hofferson."

The woman typed something into the computer before looking back up at Astrid. "Date of birth?"

"March 3rd, 1994."

"Have your address or phone number changed since you scheduled the appointment?"

"No," Astrid sighed.

"Alright. Dr. Anderson just finished up with her last appointment a few minutes ago, so you can head back to room 4. Second door on the right." The woman pointed to the narrow hallway next to the desk.

"Thanks." Astrid grabbed Hiccup's hand and followed her directions to the second door on the left, where she took a seat on the bed as she waited for the doctor. Hiccup sat down in the chair next to the bed and glanced around the dim room. He grabbed something from the counter and started to examine it.

Astrid snickered when she saw him putting on a pair of blue latex gloves. "Take those off! The doctor will be here soon," she said.

Hiccup flexed his fingers and grinned at her. "Are you ready for your exam, Ms. Hofferson?" He asked as he took a step closer to the bed.

Astrid giggled and rolled her eyes. "Knock it off," she said.

"Knock what off?" Hiccup lifted her shirt and sat down in chair next to the bed. "If you are saying that I do not take my profession seriously, Ms. Hofferson, you are incorrect."

"Hiccup-"

"Dr. Haddock."

Astrid swatted his arm. "You're going to get us in trouble."

"Ms. Hofferson, I don't believe you have the authority to tell me how to do my job-"

Hiccup jumped up as the door opened. He pulled off the gloves and dropped them in the trashcan before sitting back down next to his girlfriend, his blush evident in the dim light. She fixed her shirt and stuck her tongue out at him.

"I'm sorry for the wait. I had a bit of trouble finding your file," Dr. Anderson announced as she closed the door.

Astrid nodded and laid back down as the doctor took a seat in the swivel chair next to the bed that Hiccup had been sitting in. She kept her eyes trained on the ceiling as her shirt was lifted again.

"So how has your morning been, Astrid? Anything out of the ordinary?" Dr. Anderson asked as she squeezed a small amount of clear gel into her gloved hand and spread it over Astrid's stomach.

"Fine so far. We were planning on getting breakfast after this," Astrid said. She smiled at Hiccup and reached for one of his hands.

"That sounds wonderful. Now, lets see how that baby of yours is doing." Dr. Anderson pressed the transducer **[1]** to her belly and began to twist it around as a black and white image appeared on the monitor next to the bed.

Astrid watched the screen as it became clearer and clearer what it was that she was seeing. "Is that… is that our baby?"

"Yes it is. This right here is a leg," Dr. Anderson said as she pointed to the blurry shape on the screen. "And this is the baby's head. The baby is about the size of an orange now."

Astrid looked over at Hiccup, at loss for words. His green eyes were trained on the screen, so many emotions flashing in them at once that it was difficult for Astrid to read his expression. He noticed her gaze and squeezed her hand before returning his attention the Dr. Anderson.

If someone had told her a month ago how relieved she would be this relieved to see her baby moving, to know that his heart was beating… she would have laughed. But now, she couldn't believe what she was seeing. A tiny, healthy baby that would make an appearance in only five months. Her baby.

"Would you like to know the sex?" Dr. Anderson asked.

"I…" Astrid glanced at Hiccup, unsure.

"It's up to you. I'm happy either way," he said.

"Then yes." Astrid smiled as she watched the image on the screen move as the doctor turned the transducer to get a better view of the baby. After a few minutes of feeling the plastic device moving over her belly, she began to grow worried.

Hiccup sensed this and stroked the back of her hand with his thumb. "Is there something wrong?" He asked.

"No, not at all. Unfortunately I can't tell the sex because of the baby's position, but if you schedule another appointment in a few weeks we can take another look then," Dr. Anderson said. She offered Astrid a small towel to wipe the gel off with.

"Yeah, we'll do that," she said as she cleaned herself off. She handed the towel back and pulled her shirt down.

"Would you like pictures to take home?"

Astrid stood up and brushed a stray lock of blonde hair behind her ear. "That would be great." She looked over at Hiccup. "Did… did you want a picture of the baby?" She asked.

He nodded. "Of course. I want something to show my mom. She's going to be thrilled when she finds out," he said.

"I hope so…" Astrid opened the door and walked down the short hallway to the waiting room, where she finished filling out the paperwork and billing information.

"Hey, everything will be fine," Hiccup said. "Trust me."

"I can't. My parents are going to disown me when they find out and make it their first priority to get as far away from me as possible," Astrid said as she finished writing and returned the paperwork to the secretary.

"Astrid, you can't hide it from them forever. You know that," Hiccup sighed.

"I won't hide it from them forever. Just until he starts kindergarten."

"Well that's going to change. I called my mom yesterday and we're going to have dinner with them next Saturday," Hiccup said.

Astrid gripped the car keys in her hand tighter as she whirled around to face him, her blue eyes wide. "You what?! I-I have plans that weekend-"

"Doing what?"

"Ruff and I were going to look for a new couch after she gets back from her class," Astrid said.

"Well if you leave earlier then there should still be plenty of time to be at my parents' by six."

"Hiccup-"

"Please Astrid. My mom has been asking about dinner for weeks. She's going to show up at my door sooner or later if we don't go. This is really important to them," Hiccup said.

Astrid crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. If her parents weren't going to be in the baby's life, then she would need to get to know Hiccup's parents better. Their baby deserved to know it's grandparents. "Fine."

A grin lit up Hiccup's features. "This is going to be great! I just know that you're going to love her," he said.

Astrid gave him a small smile. What was she supposed to have done? Say no and walk all over his feelings? No matter how crazy and idiotic he could be at times, Hiccup didn't deserve that.

* * *

Hiccup pretended to not notice when Astrid swirled her straw in her drink for the fourth time since they had arrived at the little diner not even ten minutes ago. She huffed and took a sip of her strawberry-banana smoothie, thunderclouds gathering behind her stormy blue eyes.

He took a drink from his own smoothie and glanced out the window. Raindrops still fell from the grey sky and tapped on the window before rolling down the glass. It was almost as if somewhere, someone was crying, and it was their tears that he was watching roll down the window panes. Thunder rolled and lightning flashed in the clouds, startling Hiccup from his trance.

"So… we should probably talk about names," Hiccup said.

Astrid looked up, and once again her eyes resembled the clear blue sky. She let go of her straw and folded her arms on the table. "Did you have any ideas? I mean, I have a few, but they're no good."

"Try me."

A small smile crossed her lips. "Fine. For a boy, Finn Adrian, and for a girl, Valerie Grace," she said, "Now you."

Hiccup thought for a moment before speaking, "For a boy, Hayden Riley, and for a girl, Fiona Denae."

Astrid wrinkled her nose. "Denae?"

Hiccup shrugged. "It's a tradition to give your daughter the middle name Denae in my family. It goes all the way back to my great-great grandmother," he explained. "Why? Do you not like it?"

"No, it's not… it's just not my favorite name. What about Adrienne?"

"Isn't the meaning of Adrienne darkness?" Hiccup asked.

"Yeah, but-"

"And you think it's better to give our baby a name that means darkness than a family name."

"I didn't say that, Hiccup!" Astrid snapped. "It's just a middle name. You're making this seem way more complicated than it really is."

"Oh now I'm the one making things complicated? You're the one who won't listen," Hiccup said.

Astrid pursed her lips and trained her gaze on the plastic cup in front of her. "I'm just trying to make sense of things, okay? Today has been kind of a letdown," She sighed.

Hiccup took a drink of his own smoothie and thought for a moment. "How about this: if it's a boy, you get to choose the middle name and I choose the first name. If it's a girl, then I get to choose the middle name and you pick the first name," he suggested.

Astrid chewed her lip for a moment. "I think that's a good idea. That way we can both choose a part of the baby's name and everyone will be happy," she said.

Hiccup nodded. "Are you… Are you happy, Astrid? About all this I mean?"

A warm smile crossed Astrid's face as she reached across the table to grasp one of his hands. "So happy," she whispered.

Hiccup stood, holding his smoothie in his free hand, and tugged Astrid after him. He pressed his lips to hers as she stood, taking her by surprise. She melted into him, her fingers still intertwined with his. They broke apart as their lungs screamed for air, oceanic blue meeting forest green.

"So what's next on the agenda?" Hiccup asked.

"Well, I was thinking that maybe we could rent a movie? If you would rather do something else, it's not a big deal."

He smiled. "That sounds amazing."

Astrid grinned and let him pull her outside. She let go of his hand to wrap her arms around his waist as they walked, her face pressed against his side. Her ponytail was wet and clung to her skin, but she made no move to adjust it. Because she was afraid that if she let go, he would slip right through her fingers.

* * *

**[1]** A transducer is the plastic device that allows you to see the baby during a sonogram.


	10. Unexpected

_4 months and 4 days_

Astrid drummed her fingers on her knees and watched the city shoot by in a blur of lights. Her heart raced like a terrified rabbit in her chest, ready to burst free at any moment. She took a deep breath and let it go slowly.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Hiccup asked.

She nodded and rested her head on her hand. "Yeah, of course. I just really overdid it with the furniture shopping today," she said. It was partly true; her back ached every time she bent to grab something or lifted her arms over her head.

Hiccup nodded and turned the car onto a different street. "I just wanted to make sure. My mom tends to get… clingy at times, and I know today hasn't been the greatest day for either of us."

"I think I'll manage," Astrid said.

The city slowly melted away and became a small neighborhood lit by streetlights in the clear blue evening light. Oak trees reached for the clouds as people walked under them, some holding hands and others pushing strollers.

Astrid couldn't help the slight envy she felt at seeing her boyfriend's childhood home. She knew that his family had moved around a lot, but this… it was like something taken from a movie. Her family had lived in a house on the outskirts of town away from others, and she had had few friends other than Ruffnut.

The car came to a stop in front of a white three story house with a colorful flower garden out front. Hiccup led Astrid up the cobblestone path to the front door and knocked, smiling at her. She struggled to return it as a middle-aged woman opened the door and clasped a hand over her mouth, her green eyes, the same shade as Hiccup's Astrid observed, widening.

"Oh, my baby boy… you look so handsome," Mrs. Haddock said as she pulled Hiccup into a hug. He wrapped his arms around her and chuckled, relaxing into her embrace.

"It's only been a few weeks, Mom," he said. "I'm not going anywhere any time soon."

His mother let go of him and took a step back, her stunning green gaze falling on Astrid. "You better not. Oh Hiccup, you told me she was pretty, but… come in, both of you. I'll get Gerard."

Astrid blushed as Hiccup led her inside. "You think I'm pretty?" She teased.

He rolled his eyes and turned around to face her. "No, I was lying to make my mother happy. You are the hideous creature hiding under every kid's bed."

Astrid punched his shoulder, laughing. "You jerk!"

Hiccup held up his hands, grinning. "Hey, you asked."

Hiccup's mother came down the hall, a man following her. She took one of Astrid's hands in hers and smiled. "It is so nice to finally meet you, dear. You are all my son talks about these days," she said.

"It's great meeting you too, Mrs. Haddock," Astrid said.

"Oh, we're practically family now. Call me Valka."

"Alright… Valka," Astrid replied.

The man came to stand beside Valka, his arms crossed over his broad chest. His pale green eyes narrowed at Astrid from above his vivid red beard, then softened when they landed on Hiccup.

"So this must be the Astrid you've been tellin' us about, son?" He bellowed.

Hiccup laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah. The one and only."

An awkward silence passed between the four of them. Astrid crossed her arms and kept her eyes trained on her black heels, not wanting to meet the eyes of Hiccup's parents. She could feel them watching her, waiting for her to do something.

"Alright, well, dinner is on the table. I hope you like smoked salmon, Astrid," Valka said.

"I'm not much of a picky eater." Astrid tucked a lock of curled blonde hair behind her ear as she looked up at the other woman.

"Great!" Valka disappeared into the kitchen, her hands clasped together. Gerard followed his wife after a long moment of silence.

"They seem… nice," Astrid said once they were gone.

Hiccup groaned and rubbed a hand over his face. "No don't say that. My dad hasn't even started to interrogate you yet. Gods, this is why I have never had girls over."

"Well, I like them. I'm sure your dad and I will get along fine." Astrid picked at a loose thread on her royal blue dress, suddenly concerned about her appearance. Was the dress too much? It did show a bit of cleavage, but that was fine, right? And what about the heels? What if they already had an opinion about her based on her outfit?

She followed Hiccup down the hall into the dining room where his parents were already sitting down at the table. Valka smiled at them and gestured to the other two chairs while Gerard remained silent, more concerned about the food on his plate than his son and Astrid.

They sat down at the table and Valka told Hiccup about how badly Toothless had started to miss him over the weeks, and how the cat had slept every night at the foot of Hiccup's bed.

Astrid picked at her food while they talked, not at all hungry but aware of Valka's concerned gaze. She slowly lifted a piece of fish to her mouth and chewed, forcing herself to swallow. It was undercooked and a bit plain with nothing added to it, but she said nothing.

"So Astrid, do you go to Berk also?" Valka asked.

"Oh. Yeah, I have a major in English," Astrid said.

Valka nodded. "And how long have you two been together?"

Astrid opened her mouth to speak but Hiccup beat her to it. "Almost a month," he said.

Valka looked over at her husband with a smile. "Your father and I were together only five months before he asked me to marry him. I thought it was too early at the time, but look at us now. Is marriage in the cards yet?"

Hiccup's eyes widened slightly. He glanced at Astrid, but she remained silent. "Uh, Mom, we-we're not-"

Valka nodded. "I see. It's still too early. I still expect grandchildren someday though, so don't even think about taking the bachelor path. You're the only son I have," she chuckled.

Astrid felt the blood drain from her face. She lifted another piece of salmon to her mouth with a trembling hand and kept her eyes trained on her plate as she chewed.

"Well, actually, Mom. Dad. W-We have something we need to tell you," Hiccup said.

Valka smiled pleasantly at them. "Anything dear."

Hiccup took a deep breath and grabbed one of Astrid's under the table. "First, I want you to know that Astrid and I have agreed that we're going to move in together in a few months."

Valka's calm expression wavered a bit, but she nodded. Gerard also looked up, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"We, uh… A-Astrid's pregnant."

Valka's fork flattered loudly onto her plate. She gaped at them, her green eyes flicking back and forth between Hiccup and Astrid. "Do you… is that… how?" She asked. "Gods, how could you let this happen, Hiccup? I thought you were smarter than this."

"It was an accident, Mom-"

Gerard pushed his chair back and stood up suddenly, startling the three of them. His cold green eyes found Astrid as he walked past. They watched him go, a brief silence falling over the table.

Valka stood up to follow him, her eyes trained on the floor. "This is what happens when you aren't careful, Hiccup. I just… we raised you better than this. I should have known that your father was right about Cara; you wouldn't be in this mess if she hadn't influenced you," she said quietly.

Hiccup's mother walked down the hall and opened the door that Gerard had closed behind him, slipping inside the room and shutting it behind her. Their argument was not at all muffled by the walls or closed door.

Astrid grimaced when she heard her name and glanced at Hiccup. He had his face buried in his hands, clearly distressed by his parents' reaction.

"I'm sorry. I knew it would be bad, but…" He trailed off, shaking his head.

She frowned and rested a hand on his arm. "It's not your fault, Hiccup. You know that."

Hiccup threw his hand up in the air before letting it fall back to the table. "No. No I don't, Astrid. I never should have brought you here. I should have known-"

"Hey, don't say that. There's no way you could have known what was going to happen, and I don't want to see you beat yourself up for it," Astrid said. She rubbed Hiccup's arm and gave him a small smile. "Okay?"

He nodded after a long moment, his green eyes refusing to met her anxious blue ones. "Okay," he whispered.

They both looked up when the door opened. Valka stepped through it and closed it behind her wordlessly. She came over and pulled Hiccup into her arms.

"Is he…?"

Valka nodded into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry-"

"I know, baby boy. And we'll be there for you two until the end, I just… I don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. I want you to be happy."

"I am happy, Mom. So, so happy. Things are just going a bit differently than I had thought they would," Hiccup said.

Valka nodded slowly after a moment and pulled away to glance at Astrid. "If you're happy… then I will be happy for you," she said. "How far along are you, Astrid?" Valka asked, reaching over to take one of Astrid's hands in hers with a small smile.

Astrid's head shot up at the sound of her name. She hesitated and glanced at Hiccup before returning her gaze to Valka. "16 and a half weeks," she said.

"Oh, if you think the sickness was bad, just wait 'til he starts kicking," the older woman chuckled.

Astrid gave a half-hearted laugh as she helped Hiccup and his mother carry the dishes and leftovers into the kitchen. While Valka washed dishes and Hiccup put the leftovers into the fridge, she stood awkwardly at the counter.

Mother and son made an attempt at small talk before things grew too uncomfortable and Hiccup started to pull Astrid towards the door. Valka waved to them from the porch, a tight smile on her lips.


	11. More Than Just Butterflies

_4 months and 2 weeks_

Astrid jogged to catch up to Heather as her friend ducked into yet another aisle. She realized now as she chased the other blonde that it had been a mistake to bring Ruffnut and Heather with her to the store. All she had needed was shampoo, and somehow they had ended up in the baby department.

"Ooh look at this one! It's perfect," Heather cooed as she tossed a blue onesie at Astrid.

Astrid caught it easily and read the black print under the picture of an angle: Acute baby. She rolled her eyes and set the onesie on a shelf before moving onto a colorful puzzle that, according to the print on the back of the box, increased development in a baby's first two years by over 52%.

"Or what about this one? Hiccup's into Dungeons & Dragons and nerdy stuff like that, right? I bet he would love it!" Heather held up a white onesie, a bright smile on her cherry lips. The onesie read simply: Baby of Dragons.

"He doesn't watch Game of Thrones, Heather," Astrid sighed.

"Well then get him to. I'm buying this for you."

"Just put it back. We don't even know if it's a boy or girl yet." Astrid narrowed her eyes at the dark-haired woman, wishing that Ruffnut was there to knock some sense into her. Or just knock her around a bit, common sense optional.

"It's unisex," Heather called as she turned to continue down the aisle, the onesie folder over her arm.

"The baby isn't due for five months. What am I supposed to do with all this stuff until then?" Astrid said.

"I don't know. But it's so cute, you have to get it-"

"No," Astrid said.

"But she is going to look so adorable-"

"Or he."

"Stop being difficult, Astrid. You're not going to do this alone, so we're doing it now," Heather groaned.

"And you don't think that Hiccup should get a say in any of this?" Astrid crossed her arms over her chest as she followed her friend through the pastel aisles.

"This is a woman's job, Astrid. Now come on, we haven't even started looking at blankets yet," Heather said.

Astrid heard a distinct cackle behind her and shot a glare at Ruffnut, who stepped around the corner of one of the aisles a few feet away. The taller blonde held a finger to her lips and disappeared into another aisle, once again leaving Astrid alone with Heather.

Astrid sighed and turned to catch up to Heather. "You're buying me coffee after this," she called. She noticed the hideous purple and green blanket in Heather's hands and rolled her eyes. "And breakfast!"

* * *

Hours later and weighed down by plastic bags on both arms, Astrid followed Heather out of the store. Ruffnut walked beside her with a grin on her lips. Dark clouds gathered overhead and a cold wind numbed their hands, making it clear that snow would fall later in the day.

"So you can I call you Mommy Haddock now?" Ruffnut asked.

"Hiccup and I aren't planning on getting married any time soon," Astrid said as she opened one of the back doors and set the bags on the seat. She climbed into the passengers seat and buckled her seatbelt with a quiet sigh.

"So? You're carrying his kid. Its kind of the same thing," Ruffnut reasoned as she shut her door. She leaned forward to look at Astrid, her blue-gray eyes amused.

"How do?" Astrid asked.

"Well duh. Were you just going to call the kid a Hofferson? 'Cause Hofferson-Haddock is probably gonna be the winner," Ruffnut said.

"You're impossible," Astrid groaned.

"Nah. I'm just an expert. You need skills to beat this game." Ruffnut jerked a thumb at herself with a grin.

Heather scoffed. "Did you seriously just refer to yourself as a game?"

"It sounded cooler in my head, okay?"

"Nerd," Heather mumbled.

"Princess," Ruffnut shot back.

Heather's jade eyes narrowed at the blonde in the rearview mirror. "Rachel-"

"Guys, come on. For once can we get breakfast without an argument?" Astrid interrupted.

Ruffnut let go of the back of the passengers seat and put her seatbelt on. She was silent as Heather turned onto a different street, her arms crossed and the side of her face pressed against the window.

Astrid sighed and rested her head against the back of the seat. At the moment, nothing sounded better than a warm cup of coffee and a place to finally sit down. Her feet were killing her after hours of chasing Heather around the store. She wouldn't mind a hot shower either.

"Maybe if the princess gets out of the car," Ruffnut said under her breath.

"Rachel!"

* * *

Astrid set the bags by her door and collapsed on her bed. She pulled off her coat and set it next to her before pulling her laptop closer. She still needed to schedule another sonogram with Dr. Anderson before the end of the week.

She could hear Ruffnut and Heather fighting over the TV in the living room while she waited for her laptop to turn on, and rolled her eyes. As much as they were at each other's throats, they were great friends. They just happened to disagree on, well, everything.

She clicked on the internet icon and waited for it to load. She rolled into her back with a sigh, one of her hands resting on the slight rise of her abdomen. She pulled the laptop with her and rested it on her thighs while it continued to load.

Then it happened. What exactly she wasn't sure. It was like a butterfly fluttering around in her belly at first, then a little bit stronger. It took her a moment to realize what it was she was feeling, and when it finally dawned on her a bright smile lit up her features.

Astrid jumped up, her hand still on her belly, and grabbed her phone from her jacket pocket. She scrolled through her contacts and sent a text to the fourth one down. Her phone chimed with a response only a few seconds later.

Heather and Ruffnut fell silent when there was a knock at the door. One of them must have opened the door, because Hiccup was standing in her room within seconds.

"Hey," he breathed.

"Hi." Astrid smiled at him. "Do you want to…?"

Hiccup nodded and took a step closer. He glanced up at her before placing his hand next to hers on her belly. She moved her hand so it rested on top of his, and guided his hand to the center of her belly where most of the movement took place.

Hiccup's smile faded a bit. "I don't feel anything," he said.

"How can you not feel anything? I can still feel him kicking," Astrid said. She let go of his hand to feel for herself. There was absolutely nothing, not even a nudge against her palm. "Oh."

"Well at least we know he or she is okay," Hiccup said.

"Yeah. But it felt so amazing to feel him moving around in there, I wish you could've felt it too," Astrid said as she sat down on the edge of her bed.

"We still have another 5 months to go, Astrid." Hiccup sat down next to her, a faint smile crossing his features. "But I have news that will probably make you feel better."

Astrid glanced over at him. "What is it?" She asked.

"I found one."

"You found one what exactly…?"

"An apartment. 10A. It's at the end of the hall. The family living there moved out last week," Hiccup said.

"That's great! We could go check it out on Friday before my appointment," Astrid said.

Hiccup's smile fell. "I can't. I have classes Friday afternoon."

"So you're going to make me go alone?" Astrid asked.

"Can't Heather go with you? She seems nice," Hiccup suggested.

Astrid scoffed. "Yeah. That's one way to put it."

"Astrid, please. Just give her a chance. You shouldn't have to go alone."

"Then skip your class and come with me to the appointment," she said.

"You know I can't do that," Hiccup sighed.

Astrid nodded. Her gaze wandered the room and landed on one of the plastic bags by the door. "Oh. Do you want to see what Heather bought today?"

Hiccup chuckled. "Sure."

Astrid smirked as she reached forward and pulled one of the bags into her lap. "Just so you know, Heather may have gone just a little overboard. But just a little," she said sarcastically.

The look on Hiccup's face was priceless as she spilled the contents of all four bags on the bed.

"What are we supposed to do with all this for five months?" He asked.

"My point exactly."


	12. Little Bird I

_4 months, 2 weeks and 2 days_

Astrid woke up to the sound of the TV blaring in the other room. She could see through Heather's open door across the hall that the dark-haired girl was already out doing whatever it was she left to do every morning. She pulled her pillow over her head to block out Ruffnut's one-sided argument with the TV, wishing for just a few more hours of sleep.

She forced herself out of bed and grabbed a hair tie from her nightstand before following the angry voice into the main room.

"Oh come on! It's just water," Ruffnut growled. She glared at the TV from the couch, her arms crossed over her chest.

"What are you talking about?" Astrid asked.

"It's just water. They're going to be fine." Her friend gestured to the movie on the screen with a huff.

"Titanic?" she snorted. "I never took you as the romantic drama kind of person."

"I'm not. There's nothing else on," Ruff groaned.

"If you hate it so much then why are you watching it?" Astrid asked as she went into the kitchen.

"Because it's so stupid. It's impossible to not see all the things they did wrong. I mean, she should have stayed on the stupid boat! Now he's gonna die and it's her fault. He would have been fine if she listened for once."

Astrid raised an eyebrow at the taller blonde. "It's so weird to see you like this," she admitted.

"Like what?" Ruffnut growled.

"Acting like… like a girl."

Ruffnut gaped at her. "Take that back!" she shouted.

"It's true," Astrid laughed as she backed into the counter.

"No. It's. Not."

"Yes. It. Is."

"I'm gonna kill you…" Ruff seethed. She jumped over the back of the couch and ran at Astrid, the look in her eyes almost murderous.

"Rachel!" Astrid ducked under her arm and sprinted for the bathroom, grinning. She grabbed the blanket on the couch and threw it at Ruffnut as she turned down the hallway.

"Hey!" The other girl cried as the blanket hit her square in the chest.

"All is fair in love and war!" Astrid called over her shoulder.

"If this is love, then what do you consider war?" Ruffnut asked.

"Who said it was love, Rach?" She teased as she reached the bathroom. She made a face at Ruffnut before slamming the door shut. She locked it and snickered as her friend kicked and banged on the door.

"Get out here!" Ruffnut growled.

"Why? So we can watch Gone With the Wind together?" Astrid asked.

"You're the worst!" Ruffnut groaned.

"That's why you love me."

The banging and threats came to a stop. Astrid pressed her ear against the door and listened as Ruffnut's footsteps grew quieter and quieter. The TV was shut off, and the apartment suddenly became a war zone where any wrong move could get Astrid killed.

She backed away from the door, knowing better than to open it and let Ruffnut pounce on her. The other girl was probably right outside the door, just waiting For an opportunity to strike…

The front door open and shut with a click. There was nothing after that. Not even the sound of someone breathing. For a second she might have considered peeking into the living room to make sure Ruff was really gone, but she banished the thought to the back of her mind.

Until one of them have up she would be stuck in the bathroom with nothing but a hair brush and a bottle of shampoo to protect herself with. Her phone was still on the nightstand in her bedroom all the way across the hall. Making a run for it would be suicide.

But then again, Ruffnut wouldn't go as far as turning the TV off and pretending to leave the apartment to lure Astrid out of the bathroom over such a small thing. She could barely refrain from talking for that long. But then again, she was Ruffnut.

Astrid grasped the knob and turned it as slowly and quietly as possible. She took a deep breath before poking her head through the small crack, half-expecting Ruffnut to be standing right in front of it. But she wasn't. The apartment looked completely empty.

Had she really been hurt by what Astrid said? Ruff had never taken kindly to being treated like a girl before, so maybe that was it, and she just needed a little bit of time to cool down before coming back to the apartment.

But when did Ruff ever try to control her anger? Never.

Astrid opened the door and stepped into the hall, wincing when the floor freaked under her foot. She looked both ways before walking into the living room. The TV was off, the blanket still lying on the floor where it had been dropped.

"Ruffnut?" Astrid called. There was no response, which worried her even more. She looked into the kitchen. Nothing.

"Oh come on. What do you want me to say? I'm-"

She turned to go back into the living room and found herself face to face with Ruffnut, who grinned when she saw her look of absolute shock. She stumbled into the counter, pain flaring in her hip when it connected with the edge of the counter.

"Holy shit! Where- h-how did you…"

"Don't be such a girl, Astrid. It doesn't look good on you," Ruffnut snickered.

Astrid punched Ruff's shoulder and crossed her arms over her chest, frowning. Ruff pretended to be in pain and groaned as she jumped up on the counter.

"Ow, my dignity," she teased.

"Shut up," Astrid mumbled.

"Hey, don't be such an Ice Queen. You have to admit that I got you good."

"Fine. You got me. Happy?" Astrid said.

"I am actually," Ruffnut chuckled, "But you're not. What's up?"

"It's nothing. I'm fine, Ruff." Astrid said as she grabbed a glass from the cupboard.

"Lying doesn't work with me. I know you too well. It's about Hotcup, isn't it?" Ruffnut asked.

Astrid held her glass under the sink faucet and watched it slowly fill up. "Hotcup?" she scoffed.

"Pretty good, huh?"

"No. I was going to the opposite actually," Astrid said. She turned the faucet off and lifted the glass to her lips, smirking.

"Hey, he's pretty easy on the eyes. I mean, for a nerd and all." Ruffnut shrugged and tapped her fingers on the edge of the counter.

"He's not a nerd," Astrid sighed.

"Only a nerd would say that… Oh Gods, you're becoming one of them!" Ruffnut cackled.

"I am not a nerd!"

"Yes you are! Just give up and admit it! It's so obvious," Ruffnut said.

"I'm not a nerd, Ruff."

"Sure you aren't…"

Astrid groaned and rolled her eyes as she set the empty glass in the sink. "Whatever. I have an appointment at one and then I have to check out that apartment. I don't have time to argue with you," she said.

"Ice Queen!"

* * *

"What do you mean you can't let me in until two? I have an appointment at one, that won't work," Astrid said to the voice on the other end of the line.

Apparently her landlord was visiting her father and couldn't give Astrid the keys to the apartment until she got back, which would be when Astrid was still on her way back from her appointment.

"But isn't there someone who… Yes, I know. I just want to see the apartment," she sighed. She glanced at the wooden door behind her, 10A. The apartment Hiccup was supposed to be there seeing with her.

"Please, there has to be a way." Nope, not unless she drove halfway across town to get the keys and then drove all the way back before her appointment in an hour.

"Fine. Can I come back tomorrow?" she asked. "Great. I'll see you then."

Astrid folded a hand over her side when the subtle ache returned from when she had backed into the counter that morning. It seemed to slowly be moving forward and growing more intense. Just great. Another thing to add to her to do list.

She looked down at her phone and chewed her lip. With the mood she was in after talking to her landlord and the pain in her side, having a sonogram really wasn't a good idea. She scrolled through her contacts and lifted the phone to her ear as she walked down the steps.

"Hello?"

"Hi, I need to cancel an appointment for Astrid Hofferson…"


	13. Little Bird II

_4 months, 2 weeks and 3 days_

Hiccup glanced at the clock Gobber kept on the desk in the corner and groaned. He still had another four hours of work ahead of him, then a twenty minute drive home. At least there was never bad traffic.

He returned his attention to the car he was working on and grabbed the ratchet sitting on the table next to him to remove the bolts holding the old ignition coil in place. He pulled it out and set it on the floor before placing the new one inside and tightening the bolts and nuts. He then reconnected the marked wiring harness at the back of the coil and the wire plugs.

"Hiccup!"

Hiccup closed the hood of the truck before turning to Gobber, wiping his hands on the sides of his jeans. "Yeah?"

The older man hobbled over and thrust a finger at the small office he had come out of. "Yer lady friend is on the phone," he chuckled, "Best to not keep her waitin'."

He blushed and jogged into the office, his eyes searching the room for the black phone. He grabbed it and held it up to his ear, smiling. "Astrid?"

"What? No," the voice on the other end said. "Why would Astrid be in our apartment? Oh my Gods, she's one of _them_ isn't she? I knew it! I knew Ruffnut was lying to me! There's probably cameras… watching our every move…"

"What do you want, Tuff?" Hiccup sighed.

"Oh! Yeah, Fishy wanted me to tell you that he's not gonna be back in time for your stupid moving out thingy," Tuffnut said.

"You mean our guys' night?" he asked, leaning against the wall. "Great. What am I supposed to do with all of the food I bought? There's no way the three of us could eat that much."

"What about Astrid and the butt elf? Can't they come over and eat their feelings with us?" Tuff asked.

"No, Astrid shouldn't be eating junk food. It's bad for the baby. Do you have any idea what that much sugar could do to-"

"Dude. Chill. Maybe _you_ should be the one eating your feelings…"

"It's just a lot to deal with at once, okay? I don't exactly have the luxury of sitting around with my sister all day like you do," Hiccup snapped.

"Woah. Okay, who said that it's a luxury? It's a curse. She smells like old people. And also, you have a sister?" Tuffnut said.

Hiccup groaned and ran a hand through his hair. "Can I go now? I still have a lot to do in the next…" He glanced at the clock, "three hours."

"Yeah, I'll see you around, man," Tuff said.

"Bye Tuff," Hiccup sighed.

He hung up and went back into the garage, cringing when Gobber grinned and nudged his shoulder with the wrench in his hand.

"So, how'd it go with the lady?" he asked.

"That wasn't Astrid," Hiccup said.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, it was one of the guys I live with, Thomas," he explained.

"Sounded awfully feminine to me…" Gobber mumbled as he exchanged the wrench for one a smaller one.

Hiccup rolled his eyes and clicked the hood open again. "Don't question it."

"Well that kid was a strange one. Mumblin' somethin' about his fish leavin'…" Gobber said. "Can ye grab that for me?"

Hiccup reached over and grabbed one of the screwdrivers off of the small worktable. He handed it to Gobber and watched the older man work, his words caught in his throat.

He just couldn't distract himself long enough to forget that Astrid was going to look at the apartment today _alone_ , because _he_ didn't have the time to ask Gobber about changing his hours. He knew she didn't like it (he didn't either) but he also admired how well she had taken the news over breakfast yesterday morning.

* * *

Astrid didn't remember the last time she had been so cold. She sat on the couch, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders even though she was wearing her gray Berk Dragons sweatshirt. There was an open textbook in her lap and a notebook sitting next to her, the eraser of the pencil in her hand tapping against the pages. Math had never been her best subject, especially not calculus.

The apartment was silent other than the sound of the rain hitting the window. Ruff and Heather were out, doing who knows what, while she was stuck inside, driving herself crazy with all of her hopes and fears and wishes for the coming months.

Astrid couldn't concentrate on the words on the pages. Every time she tried to read them her brain shorted out, refusing to process the information. She shut the book and set it on the floor with the notebook before swinging her legs over the side of the couch. She stretched and groaned when her back popped.

The clock on the microwave read 11:32 as she walked into the kitchen, her socked feet whispering over the floor. She grabbed a banana from the basket on the counter and peeled it as she went into the bathroom and turned the shower on.

She undressed and stepped under the warm water, her arms folded around her middle. Her fingers could no longer reach her elbows because of the small bump there. She leaned her head against the shower wall and sighed, water droplets running down her face and chest.

There was so much to think about, so much to plan. She still had yet to arrange an official date for she and Hiccup to move into the new apartment. And then there was finding someone to babysit; buying a new car because there was no way she could fit a car seat in the back of her current one; telling her parents.

Astrid paused, shampoo bottle in hand, her eyes locked on the fogged up glass door as she thought.

Her parents. What would they say? Astrid didn't even know where she was at with Hiccup at that moment. She loved him, of course, but did she really want to spend the rest of her life with him?

She squeezed a small amount of the shampoo into her palm and massaged it into her hair. Its sugary strawberry scent was almost overwhelming, making her nose itch and her head feel heavy.

Astrid hated not being able to make her own decisions because of a tiny, meaningless _mistake_. It had been one drunken night, not something she would have ever thought twice about before. But it had changed her, and in a way it had changed Hiccup too.

She inhaled deeply and closed her eyes, wishing that the water would wash all of her thoughts right down the drain and far, far away from here.

The water was getting cold. Astrid shut it off and grabbed a towel hanging from the bar on the wall as she stepped out of the shower.

She dried off and got dressed before going into the living room, using the towel to try the last few water droplets clinging to her braid. It stuck to her neck and the back of her sweatshirt as she grabbed her phone and shoved it in her pocket. She stepped into her shoes and went out into the hall, pulling the door shut behind her.

The hallway was oddly quiet. There was no loud music playing behind Hiccup's door- well, his old door- and Ruff and Tuff weren't messing around at the top of the stairs. Even Heather's absence was strange. There was only the sound of the rain hitting the windows as she walked down the hall.

She gripped the keys in her hand in the warm pocket of her sweatshirt, fingering the straight edges. She came to the right door and slid then into the lock, twisting the knob and opening it easily.

The apartment was, for the most part, just like hers. The same ugly sandy tile counters in the kitchen, the same square window on the far wall, the same white carpet. But there were no memories attached to anything here.

Astrid stepped inside and closed the door. Even the scent was different. There was no bitter smell of the coffee maker she had kept in the kitchen and Ruff's lemony hair spray, which she had always asked her to throw away because It made her nauseous but now missed for some odd reason.

But it was home. They would make new memories here. They would be happy. Right?

She went over to one of the large picture windows on the far wall and looked down at the city. Cars raced by and people ran on the sidewalks, holding soggy prints of that morning's newspaper and colorful umbrellas over their heads to shield themselves from the icy downpour.

Astrid shivered and twisted her fingers in the large front pocket of her sweatshirt. Her wet braid was cold now, and it chilled her to the bone. In fact, she felt as if she had been drenched in ice water from the waist down.

She looked down and was shocked to find the front of her blue leggings soaked to the point that the fabric was black. "Oh God…" she whispered. No, no, no… this was not at all how things should have gone. This couldn't be happening. Not now. Not when she promised Hiccup that she would be fine

She swore and pulled her sweatshirt down over the large wet spot as she ran out of the apartment, her heart hammering in her chest.

Astrid threw open the door to her apartment- her old apartment, the obnoxious voice in the back of her mind reminded- and slammed it shut behind her before running into the bathroom. She sat down on the closed lid of the toilet and pulled out her phone, tears already trickling down her cheeks.

She scrolled through her contacts, her free arm wrapped around her belly, and clicked on one. She looked down and bit her lip when she saw that the wet spot was growing. Something stirred in her lower abdomen.

"Hello?"

Astrid tried to choke back a sob and failed miserably. Her calm exterior melted away. "H-H-Hicc…"

"Astrid? Are you okay?" Hiccup asked.

She couldn't do this. Not now. Not ever.

"H-Hicc-cup… I…"

"Astrid, what's going on? Are you okay? Do you need me to call Ruff or Heather?" he asked.

"I-I need you… to come home…" she sobbed.

"Astrid-"

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

Hiccup was silent for a minute. "Where are you?" he asked quietly.

"H-Home. I didn't… I d-don't know what I did wrong! I'm so, so sorry, Hiccup. I can't…"

"Astrid, it's going to be okay. I'm leaving now. Can you call someone to wait with you until I get there?" Hiccup said.

"Okay," she whispered.

"You're going to call someone?" Hiccup repeated. She heard Gobber's voice and the sound of a car door shutting in the background.

"Yes."

"Okay. I want you call them and call me right back, okay?"

Astrid took a deep, shaky breath. "Okay."

She ended the call and stared down at her phone in the lap of her wet leggings. Then she selected Ruff from her contact list and listened to the phone ring on the other end of the line, tears streaming down her face.

"Ruff? I… I need you to c-come home. I-It's the baby."


	14. Little Bird III

_4 months, 2 weeks and 3 days_

Astrid hadn't been sure how to react at first. Shock was the first thing to register in her mind. And then the fear that a small piece of her had been torn away for good came, and she just couldn't shake it, like the cold that lingered over the city. Missouri had never been a warm state to live in but the cold was unnerving.

She guessed that she had started crying shortly before Ruff got there and found her sitting on the kitchen floor. She couldn't even speak.

It was all a nightmare coming true.

"You're gonna be okay, Hofferson. Hiccup and Heather will be here soon. They'll take good care of you," Ruffnut whispered. She fell to her knees and wrapped her arms around Astrid's waist, allowing her friend to cry into the shoulder of her jacket.

"Please… I-I didn't…" Astrid trailed off, her lower lip quivering.

"Its not your fault. It happens, okay? You're going to be alright," Ruff said.

"No… the baby c-can't be…"

"I don't know." Ruffnut glanced at the clock on the microwave and sighed. "I really don't know."

Astrid nodded and pulled her friend closer with her right arm. Her left arm remained locked over her belly. She inhaled the scent of Ruffnut's hair spray and, for a single precious moment, was at peace.

Then the door opened and she came rushing back to reality. Her baby was dead and it was all her fault.

She felt another pair of arms around her, lifting her up. She didn't open her eyes to look up; she knew it was Hiccup by the sound of his voice in her ear. She could tell by the tremble in his voice that he was close to tears also.

"Oh Gods, Astrid, honey…" Heather whispered. "We're going to get you help. You'll be alright."

"I need someone's phone!" Ruff said.

"I can't find mine… Hiccup?"

"It's in the car," he said. "Let's just go. We're wasting time here."

"But traffic-"

"We don't have time to argue about traffic, Heather!" Ruff shouted.

"I'm just trying to be logical. Don't act like you're so high and mighty, Rachel. At least I'm trying to be useful unlike you," Heather huffed.

"Who sat with her for nearly an hour before you got here? Me!" Ruff said.

Astrid buried her face in Hiccup's shirt. He kissed the top of her head and adjusted his grip under her knees before nudging the door open and walking into the hall. She heard Heather and Ruffnut follow, still arguing.

The short walk to the car seemed longer than usual. Hiccup held her in his lap while Heather climbed into the drivers seat. Ruffnut sat beside her in the passenger seat.

Raindrops danced on the roof of the car as they sat in silence. Hiccup smoothed Astrid's hair with his hand, his own tears soaking into it and making it stick to her forehead.

She never once could force herself to look down. She knew what she would see. Blood, all over both of them. She could feel it running in rivers down her legs and staining his pants, still warm.

Astrid said nothing as she was lifted out of the car. She could see the clinic rising into the grey clouds in front of them as Hiccup walked. Then they were in a large room, all white and blue, and Heather was talking with an older woman in green scrubs holding a clipboard. The woman left and came back a minute later with a wheelchair, which Astrid was seated in.

Astrid kept her arms wrapped around her middle as the nurse pushed the wheelchair down the hallway, wishing she would feel something, anything, that would let her know that her baby was okay. But she knew it was pointless. The blood and the lack of movement… She was kidding herself.

* * *

"Alright Astrid, I understand you've been having some issues over the past few days, including bleeding?" Dr. Anderson asked as she came into the room, her eyebrows knit together in confusion.

Astrid nodded.

"And for how long?"

"Just today," Astrid said. "I don't know what caused it…"

Dr. Anderson nodded. "Light bleeding is actually fairly common early on in a pregnancy. It could have been caused by a recent exam or the growth or a polyps. But.."

"Is the baby okay?" Hiccup asked quietly.

Dr. Anderson sighed and sat down in one of the chairs. "I do have news. The bleeding can be considered normal, but that is not what I'm worried about." She glanced between Hiccup and Astrid before continuing, "We were unable to find a heartbeat. I'm very sorry."

Astrid inhaled sharply. "But the bleeding, he should be okay-"

Dr. Anderson shook her head. "I don't know what caused the bleeding. But labor will have to be induced to remove the baby. I can get you in for an appointment next Tuesday at earliest," she said.

A choked sob left Astrid's lips. "No… no please, you have to help us!" she cried.

"There is nothing we can do for this baby, Astrid."

"Please! I'm begging you!" Tears streamed down Astrid's face and made it impossible for her to see clearly. She leaned forward and reached for the woman but Hiccup held her arms against her sides. "Please…"

"Shhh…. Y-you're going to be okay. We'll figure this out," Hiccup said, crouching next to the bed.

Astrid turned her head to look up at him. "I just d-don't understand… I did e-everything! I read the b-books and I went to the classes and… I don't know w-where I went wrong…" she whispered.

"It's not your fault. Don't ever think that. Neither of us could done anything to prevent this," Hiccup said. He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back, his face buried in her neck.

"I-I'm so sorry," she sobbed.

Hiccup nodded, tears running in rivers down his own cheeks.

They must have sat there for hours, holding each other and crying, before a nurse came in to let Astrid know that she had been released from the hospital. Heather and Ruff were silent during the drive home, and didn't argue with her when she went over to Hiccup's apartment. As Hiccup slept beside her, his arm wrapped around her waist, she found herself wishing that she could just fly away. But that was impossible, because the little bird with broken wings had never seen the sky outside of a cage.


	15. Lost in Wonderland

Hiccup sat at the desk in the spare bedroom-turned-office with a notebook open in front of him. On it he had written a simple list. He bit the end of his pencil, a habit his mother had chided him about for years, and slouched over the page.

 _Talk to Mom, donate bags, call Meredith about leasing apartment_ , he read. Short and sweet. He thought for a minute before adding _ask Astrid about plans_ to the end of the list. Then he read it again with a frown. He scratched out Astrid's name with the pencil before sighing and scribbling out the whole list and tearing the page out of the notebook. He crumpled it up and tossed it in the trashcan next to the desk.

Hiccup leaned back, the chair creaking softly, and stared up at the white ceiling. He could hear Astrid moving around in the bedroom through the thin wall separating the two rooms. Something slammed into the wall and she swore. Hiccup winced but didn't move to help. There was no point. The door would still be locked and she would turn him down. Again.

He didn't know what to do anymore. A month ago he had thought they were in a good place. She was happy; he was happy. They had been closer than ever and then something just…snapped.

More and more exams had suddenly come up and she had to spend more and more nights hunched over her books. She even stopped meeting him for coffee after a while. And then they had gone to the hospital and that little hairline crack in the glass had exploded, leaving them to pick up the few tiny pieces left, and that was nearly impossible to do without leaving with bloody, throbbing fingers.

They lived in the same apartment yet he could barely remember the last time he had spoken to her face and not through a locked door. She always had some excuse to avoid him it seemed. 'Oh, you ordered pizza? I already picked up an extra shift at Kelley's tonight. Sorry babe.' 'I really did want to see that movie but I have finals coming up. You know how it is.' 'I really don't feel like going out tonight. My neck has been bothering me all day. You go without me.'

Hiccup didn't know what it was. At first he had thought it was just her way of grieving for the baby, but after a few days the sudden crying episodes had stopped and she had returned to normal for the most part. Or so he thought.

It hadn't been easy for him either. He needed her and he knew that, deep down, she knew that she needed him too. He hated having to fight through it alone while she had given up and let the grief consume her and turn her into a different woman. She wasn't his Astrid anymore. Every move she made was against him. He didn't know her at all.

The door opened and something was dragged down the hallway. Hiccup sat up and pushed the chair away from the desk and stood. He followed her.

Astrid stood hunched over a notebook in the kitchen. A gray wool coat hugged her frame and her blonde hair was pulled back into a pony. Her back faced him as she furiously scribbled something down and dropped the pen before reaching for the black wheeled suitcase next to her. She pulled the handle up and turned, her lips parting. "Hicc…" she started to call, but the rest of his name was caught in her throat as her gaze landed on him.

"Where are you going?" Hiccup asked. He crossed his arms over his chest, suddenly feeling frozen in their small kitchen. Or maybe that was just the cold air she was giving off as her eyes looked anywhere but him.

"I'm going home. My mom called last night and they want me to be there for Christmas," Astrid said. "Maybe you should consider calling your family too."

"Astrid...why didn't you tell me? I mean, this isn't something you hide from people," Hiccup asked.

Astrid sighed and tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. "I thought it would be the best thing to do. Quick and easy. I mean, I feel like...like I'm suffocating here." Hiccup opened his mouth to speak but she beat him to it, her right hand rising and falling back down to her side. "I know it's not easy for you either. Trust me, I do. But I need a break," she said.

"What are you talking about?" Hiccup asked.

"I feel like I'm making things harder for you by sticking around," Astrid said as she leaned against the counter.

"No. No you're not making anything harder for me. I don't understand." Hiccup shuffled his feet as he spoke, his eyes trained on a black scuff on the wall behind her.

"I'm sorry. It's just a lot, okay? And you're not exactly being supportive either…"

Hiccup's green eyes flashed as they lost interest in the wall. "I'm not being supportive? I've tried to talk with you, Astrid! I've asked everyone. No one knows what to do anymore. You're like...like a ticking bomb that could go off at any time. But did I ever complain? No! Not even when you chewed my head off for the tiniest, most ridiculous things!" Hiccup said. "And you think I'm suffocating you. Well I'm sorry, Astrid, that I care about you. Maybe I should just leave if you feel that way."

Astrid was silent. The black suitcase sat at her side, forgotten. Her blonde fringe tumbled into her eyes as she bent her head forward, eyebrows pulled together, but she made no attempt to move it.

Anyone else would have thought that she was crying.

But Hiccup knew better than that. His lips became a hard line as she scoffed, shaking her head slowly.

"You're an idiot," she said quietly. Her words seemed to echo for minutes after in the kitchen.

Hiccup frowned. "What?" he asked.

"I said, you're an idiot. You're not suffocating me. None of this has been your fault. I just...I need to get out of this city and be able to forget all of my mistakes for a week. I miss my family," Astrid said.

A smile toyed with his lips for a second. It wasn't bright enough to meet his eyes, but it was there for the briefest of moments. And after days of wondering and worrying it was enough for her. A comfortable silence fell over them then. Astrid splayed her hands out on the counter as she waited for it to pass.

"It's not your fault this happened either, you know."

She shook her head. "Don't say that."

Hiccup reached across the counter to touch her hand gently, his fitting over hers like one of the gloves from her coat pocket. "Astrid, just listen to me for once. There's nothing we could have done. And I think, deep down, you know that too," he said.

Astrid finally looked up at him. Emotions were written in clean print across her eyes, and read aloud from her lips. An open book. "I-"

Her phone chirped in her pocket, and she pulled it out. She read the text carefully before putting it back in her coat. "I have to go," she said, reaching for the suitcase. Her arm found his waist as she passed. She started to pull away but he wrapped his arms around her, soaking in her warmth and breathing in the sweet scent of her vanilla shampoo. She mumbled something into his shoulder before pulling away. She gave him a small smile before walking to the door, the black suitcase rolling behind her on four squeaky wheels.

"Astrid?"

She stopped. "Yeah?"

"When you get back, I'll take you on a real date. As long as you promise not to spill hot coffee all over me again," Hiccup said.

Astrid smiled at him as she opened the door. "I would love that," she said. And then she was gone.

* * *

Snowflakes drifted lazily from a gray sky as Astrid stepped into the Lambert-St. Louis International Airport. Her hair was plastered to her cheeks as warmth soaked through her clothing, melting away the December cold. It didn't take her long to spot the long line at the check-in counters. There were hundreds of people standing around, some dressed for the tropics while others wore heavy coats and boots.

She checked the time on her phone as she walked over. 8:03 am. Her flight would take off in an hour and 13 minutes, barely enough time to get through check-in and security. But slowly the line grew shorter and shorter until she stood at the front, talking to a man whose silver name tag read 'Michael'. He had a bright smile and a caring tone in his voice, but Astrid took no notice. Her eyes flickered between the boarding pass in his hands and the clock behind him. When he finally handed it to her, she thanked him and dashed off to security.

As Astrid waited in line, a baby held by a red-haired woman in front of her began to wail. A man in the line next to theirs mumbled something under his breath and glared at the woman. Astrid sighed and trained her eyes on the ceiling, willing the employees that ran the security check to work faster.

The mother tried to hush the screaming infant but there was no change. Astrid's hands became fists at her sides. Both the incredible pitch of the wail and the woman's constant shushing were getting on her nerves. Finally she tapped the woman on the shoulder and put a smile on her face. "May I?" she asked, glancing at the baby.

The red-haired woman thought for a moment before handing the baby to Astrid. Astrid smiled weakly at the baby, who quieted as he realized that the red-haired woman was no longer the one holding him. She hummed softly as the line moved forward and took them closer to the gate. The baby reached for a piece of her blonde hair and chewed on it as the red-haired woman laughed. She smoothed a hand over the baby's head.

"Thank you," the woman said. "He's been so fussy all day. His mother has blonde hair and she's the only one who can ever get him to quiet down. We were on our way home today."

Astrid nodded, hearing but not really listening. Her attention had been caught by the sound of the baby's giggle, and she lightly touched his soft blond curls.

"Miss?"

Astrid looked up and found one of security guards staring at her. She handed the baby back to the red-haired woman and proceeded through the security check, placing her things in a bin. It went quicker than she had expected, and she was walking to the gate within minutes. She didn't allow herself to look back at the red-haired woman with the baby, not even once.

It wasn't until she was sitting in her seat on the plane, a book sitting in her lap, that Astrid remembered something. The baby's eyes had been green, emerald green to be precise.

As the plane took off at 9:18, she sank back in her seat, wishing it would just swallow her up. That was her last thought before a welcomed slumber consumed her.

* * *

The plane touched down at the Minneapolis-Saint Paul International Airport in Minnesota at 10:45 am. Astrid was one of the first few off the plane and wasted no time in walking into one of the shops. She needed to get away from all the noise and people but had time to kill. Her brother wouldn't be there to give her a ride back to the house for another half hour.

Outside, she could see snowflakes falling, if not accumulating quicker than they had in Missouri. She wrapped her coat tighter around herself, feeling cold at just the thought of walking in such weather.

Astrid wandered around the shops and restaurants as morning shifted to afternoon. She purchased a water bottle and took a drink from it before pulling her phone.

_Two unread text messages._

Astrid unlocked her phone and read them quickly. One was from Ruffnut and the other was from Heather. Nothing from Hiccup.

_Hey when I said I was going to kick your ass at the game tonight, I didn't mean you had to leave. I talked to the nerd._

Typical of Ruff. She sent a reply and moved onto the text from Heather.

_Are you okay? I saw Henry this morning at Starbucks and he didn't look so good. He told me you were visiting your family in St Paul. You know you can talk to me if anything's up, right?_

A small smile crossed her lips. I _'m okay and yeah I know_ , she typed. She hesitated for a second before hitting the send button.

Her phone chimed again as she was about to power it off. A text from her brother.

_At the exit._

Astrid pocketed her phone again before taking off in the direction of the glass doors at the front of the airport. Snowflakes were tiny bits of stars as they fell from the sky and kissed the slick black pavement. She could see Finn leaning against the wall, swinging his car keys from his pinky finger. His blond hair was matted down by melting snow and his face was rosy from the chill. His blue eyes glittered as he looked up at her.

The drive home was comfortable. They exchanged small talk as Astrid gazed at the streets lit by colorful lights that reflected off the snow in a beautiful array of colors. Displays with Christmas trees and snowmen and reindeer were set up in every shop. At the mall she knew there would be an opportunity for children to meet Santa Claus. And she remembered every bit of it from years ago which she had thought she had forgotten. She had stepped into a snow globe and someone had shaken it, leaving the city a glittering winter wonderland.

From the moment she stepped into the house at 334 Autumn Glen Her heart skipped a beat. Everything was exactly as it had been when she left. It was like stepping back in time to her senior year of high school, almost three years ago.

It was almost perfect. She was even glad to listen to her mother rant about her book club while Finn went into the living room with their dad. Her sister, Brenna, sat at the counter across from her, a baby in her lap as her husband chased their daughter around the house. Astrid listened to them gossip for a while, but her mind was elsewhere.

She wished Hiccup was there with her, smiling and making everyone laugh with his stories about Toothless. As much as she didn't want to, she knew that deep down she wished she could fix everything. That's why when she checked her phone again that night as she laid in bed and found no new texts from him, her heart panged in her chest. She thought she had left things on a good note. But what if she hadn't? What if she had just made everything worse?

Astrid stared at the ceiling, illuminated by the soft glow of the lamp on the nightstand, the blankets pulled up to her chest. It wasn't until her sister came in to return a bag Astrid had left in the car that she was snapped from her reverie.

Brenna gave Astrid an odd look as she sat up in bed. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Fine," Astrid said easily as she ran a hand through her hair.

"You sure?" Brenna crossed her arms over her chest. In the dim light she was a young girl again, the slight bags under her eyes disappearing and her blue eyes sparkling. Astrid envied her natural beauty.

"Yes I am. Did you need something?" Astrid asked.

Her sister nodded but didn't look convinced. "No, I just came in to drop this off," she said, holding up a small black bag.

Astrid took it from her and set it on the nightstand. "Thanks."

Brenna offered a small smile and paused by the door. "Goodnight, Astrid," she said softly.

"Goodnight," Astrid called.

As the door shut behind the older woman, she lay in bed, wondering. She leaned over and turned the lamp off before rolling onto her other side. Sleep took her all too soon.

Beside her, Astrid's phone vibrated on the nightstand with an incoming call. It continued to ring until it died a few minutes later, and the house fell silent once again.


	16. Reaching For Answers

Silence rang in Hiccup's ears. He lay in bed, staring up at the dark ceiling, the sheets thrown back so that he could feel the cold seep through his clothes. The soft glow of the city lights floated through the far window.

He didn't know what it was that drove him to try again. He had to be grasping at mere threads now. She was probably with her family, happy and too caught up in catching up with them to check her phone. But even still he dialed again. And again. And again.

"Oh what's the use, Toothless," he sighed. The black kitten's ears perked up at his name. He crawled onto Hiccup's chest and tucked his paws under him, offering a sort of silent comfort only a cat could provide. Hiccup scratched behind his ears and turned his phone off.

The former stray had started living in the apartment shortly after they moved in. Valka had been too busy with her shelter to spend time with him and he had started to get stressed and wreak havoc on the house when she was away. So, with Astrid's consent, Toothless had joined their tiny, awkward family. He spent most days sleeping in the sunshine on the living room floor or begging for food every time someone came into the kitchen.

Lately, Toothless had been the only one who seemed to have any answers. His green eyes were lit with wisdom and peace. His feline gaze alone brought ease to Hiccup's racing thoughts. It was comforting to know that someone, albeit a snarky kitten, would be there to listen to his rants.

And now, with the clock on the desk reading 1:04 a.m. and only his cat as company, Hiccup wished for nothing more than a crazy idea; a plan. Anything that would distract him from the impenetrable, suffocating silence that had hung over the apartment for weeks now. But he was so tired; tired of fighting; tired of trying to come up with answers to questions that no one could answer. He just wanted to sink into the blankets and sleep for a hundred years. And then maybe, just maybe, when he woke up the sky would be just a bit clearer, and the little bird that had long since fallen silent would sing again.

* * *

_Meow._

Hiccup groaned when something scratched gently at his chest. He swept an arm over himself as he rolled onto his side, pushing the black kitten to the other side of the bed. Toothless huffed and shook his head as he sat up, staring at the back of the young man's green shirt.

_Meeoow._

Small paws rubbed insistently at Hiccup's back. "Come on, bud. I know I promised you half a can of Friskies for breakfast...I'll get to it. Just a few more minutes…" Hiccup mumbled into the pillow. A few moments later a soft snore was absorbed by the pillow, just loud enough for the kitten's sensitive ears to pick up.

Toothless' tail whipped from side to side dangerously as he lowered himself into a crouch. His eyes narrowed on his target: his sleeping friend's mop of auburn hair. If the boy would just move a tad, he could pounce right onto the top of his head. But stealth was key. So he waited, watching.

_Almost there...almost...now!_

A black blur flew through the air and landed on Hiccup's head. He jerked upright, his eyes wide open, any hope he might have had for sleeping in washed away with ice water. The kitten clung to his hair, roosting like a chicken. " _TOOTHLESS!"_

_Meow._

In a nutshell, a normal morning with Toothless.

Hiccup sat hunched at the table with a cup of steaming coffee clutched in front of his face as the kitten munched away happily at his breakfast, his tail swaying gently. "Yeah, eat your food like nothing happened. Stupid cat.." He finished his coffee and felt a shiver run up his back as he became suddenly aware of the cold.

Hiccup sighed and strode across the kitchen to set the mug in the sink. He glanced outside at the city below. People dashed down the sidewalk and cars shot by, tiny pieces in the massive, shimmering puzzle that was the city of St. Louis. Sunlight danced on the glass panels that made up the skyline. The arch rose elegantly in the distance like a silver bridge to the rising sun.

Yes, all one big puzzle, with no one to solve it.

Hiccup turned away from the window, thinking. He was done sitting around and waiting for the pieces to fall into place. He needed a plan, and he needed Astrid to come home so that he could make things right. This was where she belonged; with he and Toothless in their half-empty apartment with boxes in every corner. Not in some guest room miles and miles away. If she could just understand that she _belonged_ here and that it was _okay_ to let her guard down and not always have to _fight_ for power, they just might be okay.

That...that was it. He needed to get her to believe him. If that meant calling her and interrupting her week with her family and risking getting shot down again...then that was a chance he would have to take.

Hiccup walked out of the kitchen with a grin on his face, his cat at his heels.

This was the first step in solving _their_ puzzle.


	17. Eyes Wide Open

_Astrid._

She pressed her face into the blankets, her eyes sore and her body numb with the need for sleep. Sunlight filtered through the window and shone on the back of her shirt, slowly but surely making her skin uncomfortably hot. It didn't help that there were dozens of heavy quilts and sheets piled onto the bed.

_Astrid._

She groaned. This was supposed to be a relaxing break for her. Why couldn't she get any damn sleep?

Although it took a few painfully slow seconds, she pried her eyes open and squinted at the wall as she waited for them to adjust. She focused on the window, studying the intricate fernlike patterns of frost that had spread across the glass. It was still too early for her. She turned to face the source of the noise and found herself staring into a pair of calm, understanding blue eyes that mirrored her own.

"Astrid?"

"Brenna," Astrid croaked, a lazy smile crossing her features. She propped herself up on one arm as she gazed at her sister, still not fully awake.

The older woman jerked her head back towards the door. "Breakfast is ready, slowpoke. Everyone is waiting for you."

Astrid hesitated before sinking back into the embrace of the blankets and pillows. "I'm not hungry." She could feel Brenna's eyes on her as she rolled away from her sister. A soft sigh broke the silence as the door clicked shut.

"Astrid. Tell me what's wrong."

_Go away Brenna please just leave before I ruin everything…_

"I know you can hear me," Brenna said. She sat down on the edge of the bed and patted Astrid's leg. "Now come on, spill it. What's the big secret?"

"I'm fine. It's nothing," Astrid lied through her teeth.

"So there _is_ something."

"No, there's really not. Trust me. It's...it's not worth worrying about."

"Well if it's enough to bother you, then it must be pretty bad," Brenna said softly. She watch as Astrid shifted to fold her arms next to her. The older woman sighed through her nose and looked away. "Do you remember when I lied to Mom and Dad about hanging out with those older kids?"

Astrid opened her mouth to tell her just how irrelevant that was, but decided it wasn't worth it. She nodded.

"Well I trusted you to keep my secret. I felt guilty but after I talked to you about it, I felt confident enough to talk to Mom and Dad, and they understood. Does any of this make sense?"

Another nod.

"I want you to feel like you can trust me with anything. Even if there's a dead guy buried in our backyard I want you to feel safe with telling me...and hopefully let me help you move him somewhere else too since he'd probably smell pretty bad-"

Astrid snorted and kicked her sister's side, which made Brenna chuckle. "It's true," her sister insisted.

"Now, will you just tell me what's bugging you?"

Astrid took a deep breath and turned to face her sister. She pulled her knees up to her chest, her eyes trained on the blue lampshade that covered the small lamp on the dresser. "It's a lot," she whispered.

"That's okay," Brenna told her.

"I don't want you feel obliged to help me with anything..."

"Of course not."

"And you can't tell anyone," Astrid finished.

Brenna nodded. Astrid cleared her throat once, twice, before going on. Her lips trembled as they sought the words to explain her... _situation_.

"I met this guy. Hic- _Henry_."

_No turning back now, Astrid. Just get it over with and get out._

"I, um..I went back to his apartment with him. I slept with him. A-and then I found out I was pregnant."

Brenna remained quiet for a few moments before asking, "Does he know?"

"Yeah. He was the last person I told before you, but he knows. We're living together,."

"Are you dating him then?"

"Yes-I mean, no...I...I don't know. It's all so confusing." Hot tears welled up in her eyes, not from sadness but anger with herself.

"Is there anything else?" Brenna asked quietly.

"No," Astrid whispered.

"How far along are you?"

"I lost the baby a few weeks ago. B-but I'm still going back in a few weeks to deliver. They'll have to induce it, but th-they said everything would be o..o-okay." A dry sob left Astrid's lips as her sister pulled her into her arms. She buried her face in her shoulder and tried to catch her breath.

"Oh honey...I'm so sorry. I wish I could have been there for you," Brenna whispered. Astrid could hear the pain in her voice, and knew she was thinking about her own two children. "No one should have to go through that alone."

Astrid shook her head and slowly put space between herself and her sister. "Hiccup was always there. And Ruff and Heather too. But...I didn't tell him until it was too late. It's all my fault."

"It's not your fault this happened, Astrid. You were stupid to let a drunk stranger take you back to his place, but you never could have expected the rest of it. And if anyone ever tries to tell you anything else, I'll gladly prove them wrong," Brenna assured her.

"I know you will," Astrid whispered, a shadow of a smile pulling at her lips. "And I think it's about time I stopped letting everyone figure things out themselves while I try to fix things by myself. I'm tired of feeling alone. I...I miss Hiccup, and my friends, and I think they miss me too."

"Well I'm glad I could help. Now come on, I'm starving. Finn's not going to leave anything for us if we don't get down there soon," Brenna chuckled.

"Okay, I'll be down in a minute," Astrid said. "And Brenna?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me. It's my job. I am your sister after all." Brenna hugged Astrid one last time before leaving the room, her footsteps thudding dully down the hallway as conversation floated up the stairs.

Astrid reached across the bed for her phone. She pressed the power button and frowned when it didn't turn on. She crossed the room to grab her charger before plugging it into the outlet next to the bed and sitting back down. Slowly the phone charged and the screen lit up.

_Two missed calls from Hiccup._

When had Hiccup called her? Astrid bit her lip as she scrolled through her contacts, stopping at the lone name under the H category. She lifted the phone to her ear and jogged across the room to close the door. The room felt too quiet as she waited for him to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Hey," Astrid answered.

"Astrid? I thought you were at your parents'?"

"I am. I just...I needed to talk to you again. I miss you."

There was no response from the other end for a few seconds. Astrid's heart banged against her ribcage like a caged dragon as she waited for him to say something; anything.

And then came his reply, like a breath of fresh air: "I miss you too, Astrid."

She smiled to herself. "How's Toothless?'

"Uh, he's...he's good. He destroyed another one of my shirts yesterday."

"You should really think about having him declawed, you know," she said.

"Yeah. Speaking of claws, Ruff came by earlier. She wants you to call her," Hiccup said.

"Alright, I'll do that tonight." Astrid could hear someone coming back up the steps and knew she had to wrap things up. "Look, I have to go, but I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Oh. Sure."

"Bye, Hiccup."

"Astrid...I love you."

The world came crashing down around her with those three simple words. _He loved her_. What did that mean? Did she love him? If she did, could she summon the courage to say it too? The warm, fuzzy feeling that swirled in her chest told her _yes_.

"I love you too, Hiccup."

She grinned like an idiot as the other end went dead. And just in time; Finn came in not a moment later. He rolled his eyes when he saw the look on her face and told her to come downstairs. She flicked the back of his head as she walked by, a heavy weight lifted from her shoulders.

* * *

After breakfast, they walked the short distance to the pond just passed the end of their street. Brenna's husband carried their daughter, Carrie, on his shoulders while Brenna walked beside him, the 14 month old in her arms. Their mother had been reluctant to let Brenna leave with the baby after seeing the temperature, but she kept her mouth shut as their father talked to Brenna and her husband. Finn and Astrid walked behind the group, carrying the equipment. Finn tossed the puck in the air every few minutes and caught it again in his right hand as he gazed across the snowy field.

When they finally reached the pond, Astrid's mother and Brenna made a beeline for the edge of it while the others set up the game. Carrie stumbled over to them, struggling to see over the high collar of her pink jacket.

Astrid dropped two orange cones at both ends of the pond before meeting her brother and father in the center. "Teams?" she asked.

"I'll take Brenna and David," her father replied after a minute. "You, Finn and your mom can take the left side of the pond. Sound good?"

"Sure," Finn said as he bent to grab a stick. He tapped Astrid on the shoulder with the silver tape-covered end of it and slid away as she turned towards him. "Mom, Brenna, you playing?" he called from the other side of the pond. Astrid held up two sticks as he spoke.

"Someone has to stay with the kids," Ingrid replied. She sat down in the snow bank next to Carrie and Brenna. She chuckled as she watched the little girl toddle over to her and collapse in the snow, her hat falling over her eyes.

"Brenna?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," she called. She pushed herself to her feet and took one of the sticks from Astrid before slowly sliding across the icy pond, her free hand trembling at her side as she struggled to keep her balance.

The early morning cold nipped at their cheeks and the wind gently carried snow across the field as they played, the sound of slapping sticks and laughter breaking the crisp silence. It had been a tradition ever since Brenna and Finn were toddlers and Astrid was only a few months old. Every year on the 18th of

December, on those few precious years when everyone _could_ make it, they would come out here to play hockey. It just wasn't Christmas until they did.

Astrid watched over Finn's shoulder as her dad swiped at the puck, then dove in front of the two orange cones that represented the goal. Her cheek stung as it connected with the ice but she forced herself to get back on her feet. Next to her, Brenna bent awkwardly, blonde hair tumbling over her shoulders and legs trembling as she slid forward. Her boots left streaks in the thin dusting of snow that blanketed the ice.

"Finn!" Astrid retook her place in front of the goal, her eyes on David as he managed to skate by her mother, completely undetected. Finn chased after him and sent the puck back to the other side of the pond, where their father stopped it.

"I can't believe you guys do this for _fun_. Chasing each other with sticks...it's barbaric. Sometimes I wonder if we're actually related," Brenna chuckled. She nudged Astrid's shoulder with her own playfully.

Astrid gave her a small smile. "You wouldn't understand it."

Brenna rolled her eyes and held the stick out at her side and watched the rest of the family play. "Of course not," she said. She bumped Astrid's side gently with the handle of the stick. "So, tell me more about this boy toy of yours. _Henry_."

"He's not my boy toy. We haven't even been...together...for that long. Not officially anyway," Astrid huffed.

"Oh?" Another nudge.

Astrid growled under her breath when her sister nudged her for the fourth time in the few minutes that had passed. "Would you stop that?"

Brenna gave her an odd look. "Stop...what?"

"Poking me."

"I'm not."

"Well you were a second ago," Astrid said.

"Astrid, I only did it twice," Brenna said. She placed a hand on her hip as she turned to look at the younger woman, her blue eyes narrowed.

"Four times."

"I did not!" Brenna sighed.

"Why are you-" Astrid paused, clasping a hand over her stomach, suddenly feeling dizzy. "I think I'm going to be sick."

_Stupid airline with their stupid cheap snacks._

"You okay?"

Astrid shook her head and left the ice, dropping her stick as she went. The feeling of dizziness passed by the time she reached the snow bank, but she kept walking. Nausea meant she was sick, and she couldn't be sick. She had work and school and so much to fix right now.

"Astrid! Wait!"

She kept walking. Anxiety had filled the empty shoes her happiness from only moments ago had left, filling her head with worst case scenarios. It was a relief to see the thin tree in their backyard in the distance, the lights on its branches twinkling in the dim gray light. Something fluttered under her hand and her head felt dizzy again. She was going to be sick.

Astrid stopped, waiting for the vile taste of bile to fill her mouth, but it never came. She stood there, breathing through her mouth even as her lips grew cold and dry, until her sister caught up to her. Brenna placed a hand on her shoulder, her eyebrows knit together.

"What happened?" the older woman asked softly.

Astrid shook her head. There was more fluttering, this time tickling her palm.

"Astrid, talk to me."

"I..I think I'm pregnant."

"But that's impossible. I thought you lost the baby?" Brenna asked.

"I did," Astrid whispered.

"Then how…?"

"I don't know. But something is definitely wrong," Astrid said. She straightened as the rest of the family came within hearing range, varying degrees of concern painted on their rosy faces. She smiled, her eyes dull, and let them lead her back to the house, her hand returning to her side, a plan forming in her head.


	18. A New Kind of Beautiful

A-are you sure?"

Hiccup ran his fingers through his hair again. His head was heavy with exhaustion but he couldn't force his eyes shut, no matter how badly he wanted to block out the entire world and just sink into the couch. Across from him, Astrid was perched on the edge of the counter, streaks of dark makeup shadowing her dry eyes as she rubbed at them.

She nodded.

"But...how?" Hiccup whispered. He could feel his heart stuttering over every beat, his mind struggling to keep up with the constant flow of thoughts that went through his head. His emotions were a wreck. He wasn't mad, far from it actually, but it was impossible to feel joy when he just couldn't wrap his head around the situation.

Astrid wasn't faring much better. She had come home that morning with a grim smile on her face and told him to sit down, which had sent a wave of fear surging through him, before sharing everything that had happened in the past few days. Her sister had offered to come down if they needed help with anything, but her brother and parents hadn't been quite as willing. Astrid had told Hiccup that Finn was too busy with his job and her parents had come close to driving her to the airport the moment she broke the news to them. She hadn't cried, but she had held Toothless close to her chest as she spoke, her voice wavering ever so slightly now and then.

"I called Dr. Anderson's office when I got to the airport. I have an appointment with her at 1:00. Hopefully she can explain what's going on because...Hiccup, I really don't know," Astrid said softly. She crossed her legs before continuing, "It was like nothing had changed. I felt something and it just couldn't have been my imagination. I think something happened when they told us there wasn't a heartbeat, because there is still _something_ there."

"But what about the bleeding?" Hiccup asked. He propped his chin up on his fists as he turned his gaze on her.

"I don't know. Brenna and I did some research and she thought it might have been an amniotic fluid leak, but that probably would have led to other problems and nothing else has happened. The baby is moving normally again apparently, so there has to of been something that wasn't right. Am I making any sense?" Astrid heaved a low breath and met his eyes.

Hiccup nodded slowly, despite how difficult it was for him to process her words. It was all happening so quickly. He just wanted a single minute to gather his thoughts and breathe before reality came rushing back at him again. "Are you happy? With all this, I mean," he whispered.

Her eyes remained trained on her hands, which were balled tightly in her lap. A car started in the parking lot and pulled away. A door slammed down the hall. All the while, she was silent, but he could see the words dancing behind her eyes.

 _How long ago had it been that_ she _was the one asking_ him _that very question?_

"Astrid?"

Another moment skipped past before she lifted her head, a small smile on her lips. "Yeah. I...I think I am," she said, more to herself than him. It was nice to hear those words and know that, for the first time in a long while, she truly meant them. "I'm happy."

Tomorrow, when they got to the clinic, she promised herself that everything would be fine, no matter what the test results showed. There was no time to wonder about how Plan A could have gone; how it did go in the end. It was time for Plan B.

* * *

Astrid's foot tapped against the edge of the table. She could see Hiccup out of the corner of her eye, his lips pursed as he flipped through an old magazine from the rack beside the door. Any minute, Dr. Anderson would waltz in with an answer. She would tell them that everything would be fine. And then they could go home and talk and maybe, just maybe, they could fix things.

At least, that's what Astrid hoped would happen.

The heaviness that had filled the air around her and bore down on her shoulders had crept back over the last few days, leaving her feeling somewhat lighter. She could still feel that heaviness lurking not far away, always looking over her shoulder, but she tried to shove the thought from her mind. What she didn't know couldn't hurt her and all, right?

They both lifted their heads when the door closed softly. Dr. Anderson gazed back at them, a clipboard held to her chest. She offered a small smile as she crossed the room to the small desk and logged into the computer. "Well, the first thing you should know is everything is going to be fine," she said.

Astrid glanced at Hiccup. He caught her gaze and smiled, reaching for her hand. She smiled back but returned her attention to the doctor, waiting for her to continue.

"I've only seen a case like this twice before in 19 years I've been working for this clinic, and none of them have been exactly the same. So what I'm going to tell you right now is just the basic, need-to-know information. I don't want to scare you with statistics and rare possibilities. Alright?"

"Yes," Hiccup said softly. Astrid nodded, her eyes drifting back down to their joined hands, which were laid on her knee.

"Good. Astrid, you have what we call a retroverted uterus, which means that the uterus is tilted backwards towards the back of the pelvis. It's only visible in a vaginal exam, so there was no way for us to see it when you first came in. It won't cause you any issues in the future with getting pregnant, but it does make it much more difficult to hear the baby's heartbeat," Dr. Anderson said, her hands waving as she spoke.

"But wouldn't I have felt something...you know, different? Pain?" Astrid asked.

Dr. Anderson shook her head. "No. Like I said, it's very hard to detect. But it's also very common. Approximately 30% of women have a retroverted uterus and are able to raise families without difficulty. That brings me to my next point, inactivity. It's normal for the fetus to go days or weeks at a time without large movements, especially towards the end of the pregnancy, so I don't see anything surprising there."

Astrid bit her lip, soaking up the information as quickly as she could. She felt Hiccup's fingers tapping nervously against her knee, so she squeezed his hand gently.

"And, now, this took me quite a bit to put my finger on, but I believe you went through something called Vanishing Twin Syndrome," Dr. Anderson said after a moment of silence. Her eyes darted between their confused faces.

"What's that?" Hiccup asked.

"Vanishing Twin Syndrome is when one of the twins is absorbed by either the mother of the other baby. Bleeding and slight pelvic pain are common side effects, which may lead some women to believe that they are having a miscarriage."

"I...I"m sorry, did you say there were _two_ babies?" Astrid asked softly, her brows knitting together in thought.

"Yes."

"But...how? That doesn't make any sense. There was always just one during the ultrasounds." Astrid ran her free hand through her hair, sighing heavily. Her face felt hot and her eyes were becoming drier by the second.

"It's very, very common for one of the twins to 'hide,' especially when the mother has a retroverted uterus. It's very difficult to see both when the uterus is tilted at such an angle," Dr. Anderson explained.

Astrid nodded. Her fringe fell into her eyes again, but she didn't dare reach up to fix it.

"So what now?" Hiccup asked.

Dr. Anderson shifted slightly in her chair. "Now, I'm hoping that you can go home and continue doing things as you have. From what I have here," she gestured to the clipboard with her pen, "the baby seems to be growing steadily and very healthy. Try to count the kicks if you can. 10 per hour is normal, but I understand that sometimes it may be difficult to keep track of them. Just take it easy from here on out, alright?" she said, standing to usher them out of the room and back out into the waiting area.

Astrid stopped suddenly, letting go of Hiccup's hand. "Just to be sure, the twin is gone, right?" she asked quietly. The doctor nodded before retreating behind the door that led to the exam rooms. Astrid felt guilt trickle into her chest, but smiled as she retook Hiccup's hand.

* * *

The cafe wasn't very busy when they sat down at the table farthest from the door, the one that had the best view of the bustling street. It was the very same table they had sat at five months before.

 _Things were so different back then,_ she thought as she traced the lip of her foam cup. It was just water this time. She would probably never drink coffee again after _the incident_. Hiccup was smiling at her in that silly, boyish way of his, his eyes reminding her of the tall spruce trees that grew in Eisenhower Park, which they had cut through after making a quick stop at a small shop and parking the car at the curb. The fresh morning air had held both the late sting of winter and the promise of spring as they had walked, laughing and smiling in a way they hadn't for months.

_She had missed that._

"It's funny how things change with time," Astrid said. She laughed once.

Hiccup nodded, his eyes leaving the window to find hers. "I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing yet."

"I don't think we'll ever really know," she said.

They stayed only a few minutes longer, which was just enough time to get a catch their breath and gather their thoughts, before tossing their foam cups into the trash and heading back towards Eisenhower Park.

"You're sure you want to do this?" Hiccup asked.

Astrid looked up at him, struck by how different he seemed, the collar of his coat pulled up high and his cheeks pink from the cold. He gave her a small, gentle smile. Just weeks ago, he hadn't been able to look at her without turning away. That Hiccup, the old Hiccup, had forgotten how to smile.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure."

_Why was it now that everything was changing?_

The plastic pot of pink, yellow and white rose buds in Astrid's right hand remained tucked against her side as she held Hiccup's hand in her left, her heartbeat quickening as they made their way back one of the old aspen trees. As usual, there was no one under it.

She fell to her knees once under the faint shade of the tree and pulled on a pair of gloves she had taken from the clinic. She set the pot down next to her and began to dig a small hole in the soft earth.

Hiccup knelt beside her and helped her lower the flowers into the ground before packing the dirt back down around them. He wrapped an arm around her waist, holding her as she slipped the gloves off and tucked them into the now empty pot.

"We'll come back, won't we?" she asked.

"As many times as you want to," Hiccup whispered. "But we're going to freeze out here if we don't get going soon, m'lady." He kissed the top of her head before standing up, pulling her along. She hugged his waist as they walked, her face pressed against his shoulder.

Once they were seated inside the car, the heater bringing warmth back into their chilled noses and cheeks, the darkness began to creep forward once more, threatening to engulf her as it always did.

But instead, she turned her head away from the misted window and smiled at Hiccup. And he smiled back, that bright, ridiculous smile of his chasing away any dark thought that ever crossed her mind.

 _Change just might be beautiful,_ she thought.

* * *

**What the different colors of the roses symbolize:**

**Yellow:** Friendship, affection, goodbye

 **Light pink:** Sweetness, admiration

 **White:** Innocence, silence


	19. Black and White

Astrid sighed softly as she laid the two black and white images side by side on the counter. The first had been taken during a time when she wanted nothing more to be rid of her _burden,_ and the second was proof that she really had needed the _burden_ after all. In one, a healthy girl that would grow and laugh, and in the other, a boy that would never feel the sunshine or see the rain that was his mother's tears.

Past and Present.

Life and Death.

It was strange, looking back on everything that had happened in the past six months. She had never thought a person could go through such drastic changes in such a short period of time. But those changes were beautiful. Change had pushed her to open her eyes to the vibrant colors and sounds of the always-on-the-move world around her, and that realization made her proud.

It hurt to know that she would never see her baby boy's smile, or hold his tiny hand in hers, but she wouldn't forget him. She would always have a place reserved in her heart for him, even as the years came and went and the memories faded away.

Astrid's head snapped up as the front door closed. She hadn't even heard it unlock. Ruffnut came into the kitchen a moment later, a plastic bag in hand and a bright smile plastered to her face. "Well look who I finally found," she said.

Astrid rolled her eyes and slipped the pictures back into the manila envelope she had kept them in. "You could have just called," she said.

"But that wouldn't have been as much fun," Ruff pointed out as if it should have been obvious to Astrid. "Whatever. I got you something." She tossed the bag at Astrid, who stumbled as she caught it.

Astrid gave the taller girl a look as she opened the bag and removed its contents: a stuffed blue dragon. She touched the crown of spines behind its eyes, feeling the soft fabric beneath her fingertips. "Rach, this is adorable. Thank you. But...how did you get into my apartment?"

Ruff shrugged and grinned. "Remember when you asked me to get your jacket for you last week?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well I found an extra set of keys in a drawer of your desk. So I borrowed them, had a copy made, and brought back the old pair. You probably didn't even notice they were gone, did you?" Ruff laughed.

"This is why I just don't ask," Astrid sighed. She took the stuffed dragon and the envelope into her bedroom and set them on the bed before returning to the kitchen. Ruff was lying on the couch, her arm draped over her eyes, Toothless pawing boredly at her leg from his spot on the top of the couch. Astrid paused.

"Wait, did you say you were looking in my desk drawers?" Astrid asked, folding her arms over her chest as she thought.

Ruff sat up slowly. "Yeah…but, you didn't tell me not to."

"Rachel!"

* * *

Hiccup had walked by the tree at least four times before he finally willed himself to turn back and sit under it. He let his eyes fall shut as his back hit the trunk, damp from the heavy rainfall. A few of the leaves had fallen to form an orange blanket around the base of the tree since he had last been there nearly two weeks ago.

He gazed at the park around him, watching as the people hurried down the paths and the cars rushed by in a blur. The air still held a fresh scent to it, a lingering sign of the dark rain clouds that had hung over the city all week.

A muffled chirp pulled his attention away from the movements of the city. He pulled his phone from his pocket and wiped away the raindrops that had landed on its screen with the cuff of his sleeve. With a light sigh he unlocked the screen and scanned the new text. He hadn't even finished reading when a familiar voice called his name.

"Hey," Astrid sighed as she sat down next to him.

"Hi." He slid the phone back into his pocket, smiling at her. She smiled back faintly from under the wet hood of her sweatshirt.

"I was looking at them again today," she said after a long pause.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, yeah of course. I was just wondering...do you think things would be different if they were both still...here?" Astrid asked, toying with the strings of her sweatshirt.

"Probably. I mean, our apartment would be way too small for the four of us and Toothless. And I would have to quit my job at the garage to help out," Hiccup said. "But I think we would be happy, and that would make it worth it."

"I just...I'm worried that something is going to happen to her too. And then they'll both be gone." Astrid rested her head on his shoulder, offering a half-hearted smile as he smoothed a hand over her hair.

"Nothing will happen. And even if there was a chance that something did, we would take care of it. Okay?" Hiccup asked.

"I guess," she said.

"No, not I guess, Astrid. There's nothing anyone could have done. It wasn't your fault or my fault that what happened had to happen. But I know that you're smarter than to think that." He pulled her closer, and they watched as the rain began to fall in gray sheets, content with the silence.

"I love you, you know that?"

"Yeah, and I love you too, babe, as much as you confuse me sometimes."

"Hey!"

Astrid smiled and pressed her face into the side of his jacket, inhaling his familiar woodsy scent. This moment felt so right. Hiccup, the rain, the city...all of it, as close to a cliche romance as it might have sounded. She was happy, even if this was her Plan B.


	20. Epilogue

_5 years later_

Astrid returned the last plate to the cupboard and dried her soapy hands on a dish towel, a soft sigh escaping her lips. Laughter floated in through the open window along with the faint but sweet summer breeze, a song she would always love, even when it played no more.

Astrid brushed a stray lock of blonde hair from her face as she crossed the kitchen and walked out onto the porch, her eyes scanning the orange sky. Her arms hugged her sides as she rocked back on her heels, taking in the sight.

The sun dipped low behind the trees, so low that it dared her to run and reach as high as she could, to steal some of its warm light. Stars had just begun to dot the sky, their light faint at first but growing brighter as the orange clouds faded into a hazy twilight. It was a scene she never would have imagined seeing outside of a greeting card. But ever since they had moved out of their apartment in the city, she had grown more and more used to seeing it on a nightly basis.

A shriek of laughter pierced the air, begging for Astrid's attention. She smiled as she sat down on the steps and pulled her knees to her chest, watching as Hiccup chased Valerie around the yard, her purple skirt flying out behind her. She squealed when he finally caught her, pulling her into his chest as they rolled across the grass.

"Hey, be careful. That one's one of a kind," Astrid called.

Hiccup rolled his eyes playfully as he stood, hefting Valerie onto his hip. "Alright, alright. But only because tomorrow is going to be a long day and _someone_ needs to get to bed," he said.

Valerie giggled and pressed her face against her father's sleeve as he carried her across the yard. When she saw her mother's smiling face out of the corner of her eye, she wriggled and knotted her hands in his shirt until he set her down. Hiccup watched as she raced inside, Astrid following.

He stepped into the kitchen, pulling the door shut behind him. He could hear Astrid and Valerie upstairs, Valerie's soft footfalls racing over his head as Astrid's voice floated through the ceiling. He braced himself against the counter, content to just listen. It was Astrid's turn to come up with a bedtime story anyhow, although Val had been trying to convince them for the last week that she didn't need them to tuck her into bed anymore; that she could take care of herself.

And oh, how he _hated_ hearing those words.

Astrid had taken it with a grain of salt and somehow gotten Val to agree that she could get herself ready in the morning, all by herself, if she allowed her parents to tuck her in at night. And so far it had worked out just fine.

But who knew how long it would be until she stopped wanting them around all together? Because times were changing so quickly, and it didn't look like they would be slowing down any time soon.

Six years ago, it had been just Astrid and he, living in a cramped St. Louis apartment, working all day to come home and sit in silence. Back then he had grown accustomed to change and took it with a grain of salt. Now, he wanted to hold on tight and never let go. Where had the days and years vanished to?

"Hey, is everything alright?"

Hiccup pulled his eyes away from the window and found Astrid standing at the foot of the stairs, her lips pursed in thought. She had pulled her long hair into a ponytail, which caressed her shoulders as she stepped into the kitchen.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine," he said. He let go of the counter, feeling blood rush back into his fingers as he did so. _How had he been gripping the edge of the counter so tightly without noticing?_

"Well, you sure don't look fine. What's going on?" Astrid asked, her voice taking on a gentler tone.

Hiccup shook his head and flashed a smile at her. "No, I'm fine. Don't worry about it," he insisted.

He could see her eyes clouding over now, hiding her emotions from view. Her arms folded across her chest as she crossed the kitchen to where he stood by the door. "You know that never works," she said. And she was right; it never worked in the slightest.

Hiccup breathed a sigh and leaned against the counter once more. "It's just...she doesn't need us anymore, Astrid. She won't even let us tuck her in at night."

A small smile crossed Astrid's face. "She does need us, you especially. When I was upstairs, do you know what she told me?" she asked.

Hiccup shook his head.

"She told me that she wanted _you_ to tell her a story tonight, because my stories aren't as _interesting_. She's never said anything like that about me, Hiccup."

"She's just used to me being around more than usual since you started working again," Hiccup objected. He forced himself to look elsewhere; he couldn't look into her eyes and see the way she wilted with his words. _God, why was this so difficult?_

"It's been two years since I started working again. I've had plenty of time to bond with her. She's just growing up is all," Astrid said. "She's figuring out who she is."

"Well maybe I don't want her to grow up. Because someday, she's going to stop needing us for good, and she'll stop coming home, just like I did when my parents divorced," Hiccup said. He could feel his stomach churning as he spoke. He didn't want to believe his own words.

"And she'll come back," Astrid said.

"But what if she doesn't? I know I didn't want to stick around my dad when I had the opportunity to leave."

Astrid wrapped her arms around Hiccup's waist and rested her chin in the crook of his shoulder. "She'll come back for her superhero. Who else will teach her how to fix a flat tire, or help her build her first computer, or show her that words are stronger than actions?"

"Are you saying you aren't capable of all that?" Hiccup asked.

Astrid rolled her eyes and stole a quick kiss before pushing him towards the stairs. "Go on. She still needs to hear that story."

He smiled to himself as he jogged up the stairs. Val's blue nightlight lit up the hallway, showering the walls and carpet with glowing stars and crescent moons. She was half asleep when he stepped into her room, her purple blanket pulled around her like a cocoon. Toothless had been watching intently as the lone goldfish in the aquarium on the dresser wound between the colorful plastic plants. _The perfect watchcat._

Toothless emitted a low purr as Hiccup bent down to scratch the silky fur behind his ears, but didn't dare move from his spot next to the aquarium.

"Dad?"

Hiccup stepped away from the dresser, his head swivelling in the direction of the small voice. He could almost hear Toothless grumble and raise the fur at the base of his tail angrily at the thought of being ignored.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Aren't you going to tell me a story?" Val asked as she propped herself up on one of the many stuffed animals on the bed. She hugged the blue dragon's neck, her cheek pressed against its side.

He sat down on the edge of the bed, humming in thought. Val crawled closer, clutching the stuffed blue dragon as she waited for him to begin the story. "Alright," he said after a moment, smiling down at her.

"Once upon a time, there was a little bird that had never seen the sky…"

_~Finish~_


End file.
